Oh, Susanica!

As I was saying...

2012-01-31T20:49:00.001-05:00

Seems it's been a while since I've posted again, so I'm going to share some observations about our kids that I've made on Facebook in the past few weeks (actually Susanne posted the last one which makes me laugh every time I see it!) Cheers! -M

January 30, 2012

This morning I spilled some water and muttered a bit loudly "oh s*it!" From the bathtub Benji then happily chirped "oh chips!" Oh alright. He happily chirped what I'd said. :-(

January 27, 2012

Life lesson #207. Approach yakking/yelling toddler in the pre-dawn hours like approaching a ferocious beast. Make no eye contact. Give commands in a gentle voice. Show no fear while slowly backing away...

January 26, 2012

"Just 2 more minutes of rocky rocky (rocking) Danny". "Aw..5 minutes! Please!" "Hmm...okay, how about 1.5 minutes?" He drifted off to sleep, thrilled with his "victory". Are you smarter than a 4 year old? ;-)

January 24, 2012

What to do when 1,2,3 Magic becomes 1,2,3 Monotony?

January 23, 2012

If there was FB for 2 yr olds, would they post stuff like "I did it!" Would they change status to stuff like "potty trained?" And would they have "mine, mine, mine" buttons?

January 22, 2012

Cognitive dissonance=4 year old playing awesome super hero while bursting out tears about every teeny tiny boo boo :-)

January 19, 2012

I love that Benji's new favorite thing to do is yell "HUG" and give big bear hugs. Makes all the rest of this stuff in life seem rather unimportant :-)

January 15, 2012

So apparently the nickname "Stinkerbelle" is not our toddler's favorites. "No, no mommy!" he disagrees. Hmm...alright, but there is something to be said for "if the shoe--er--diaper fits...

January 14, 2012

Not much sweeter than seeing a 2 year old view his Nana via Skype for the first time, saying bye-bye by planting a big kiss on her (or rather the screen).

January 9, 2012

Dear Spellcheck. My son's name is "Benji" not "Banjo". Really. Sincerely, Maniac

January 9, 2012

I quote: Mama, can you pause the snow? - Danny

Benji Sings!

2012-01-24T21:07:00.000-05:00

My Brain is Full. May I Be Excused Please?

2012-01-19T08:57:00.000-05:00

Wow. Information, information. So much information. Blogs and Facebook and a Facebook-like collaboration site at work. Our Yahoo e-mail, my always piling up work e-mail, newspapers, links to interesting articles, stuff from Danny's school (both via e-mail and in his daily folder.) I can connect instantly to the treasure trove of "online" from work, home--my Blackberry, Su's IPhone, my new Kindle. I sometimes think there is a limit to what I can manage, and this, ladies and gentlemen is the excuse I give this week for being such a negligent blogger of late. I don't have time to create. I'm too busy digesting!

Sometimes I wonder what it must have been like to live in the not too distant past. Most people never traveled probably more than 20 miles from where they were born. Their "social network" consisted of their neighbors, church friends and folks from town. If you could read, I'm sure that books could open your mind to a whole new world of thoughts and images, but more than likely books were not that easy to come by for most.

Would this have been a boring life? If this was the only life you ever knew, how would you make an assessment that it was boring? And what is the opposite of boring anyway? Is this crazy 200 mile per hour ride every day down this "information superhighway" the anti-boring? I don't think so.

I think it's good in that our brains probably stay pretty sharp as we continually make connections with new information. But I think that the overload can also hurt. Our minds become so full of "stuff" that there is scant room for reflection and deeper thinking on well, anything.

But our world is what it is. I could do all sorts of things to slow down the onslaught, and sometimes I do. I'll opt out of some e-mails that I get constantly and never read. Or I'll request a digest from listserves rather than getting sometimes dozens of messages each day. But for the most part, I continue to slog through. Mindfully at times, but more often that not, mindlessly.

I could have written this in a private diary or journal, but no, I had to blog this deep thought. You know, so I could add some new food for thought to your world.

You're welcome. -Monica

The Crack (or is that the creak?) of Dawn...

2012-01-04T14:25:00.005-05:00

I'm an early riser. Didn't always used to be that way, but for about 10 years now I have easily woken up at or before 6 am. There is not much I enjoy more than heading downstairs and as the sun gently rises, reading the paper from cover to cover with a hot cup of coffee.

In reality, this hardly ever happens.

Why you may ask? Exhibit A shown here.

Oh how I love them, but oh how they torment me with their keen hearing. You see, our house is well built and not too creaky, but when I dare to tempt the fates by QUIETLY opening our door, then QUIETLY going to the bathroom before attempting to navigate the steps, I find myself holding my breath waiting for one of them to cry out.

If I am lucky, I can survive this portion of the competition, but then it's on to the stairs. The dreaded stairs.

Should I try to dash quickly down them? Or slowly descend, stopping on each step, hoping beyond hope that I've not been discovered?

As it turns out, none of my strategies seem to matter much. One of the boys inevitably wakes up and calls out (which of course wakes up his brother). If it's Danny, he's up and running out of his room, excitedly telling me all about his latest dream (this morning it was that he lived in an aquarium and his best friend was scuba diving there with our fish.) If it's the little guy in his crib, he begins his loud and persistent demand for MOMMY! MAMA! Benji will not take no for an answer. There is no winning.

So when I wake up early if I have a book I try to read. If not, I daydream about the newspaper just waiting for me one flight down. Calling my name I swear. I will admit that sometimes I feel like a prisoner in my own home.

Then when my impulses get the best of me, although I know I shouldn't, I try once more to sneak downstairs. And every once in a great while I succeed. Then there are the other 99% of the times.

There's always tomorrow ;-) -Monica

Ah yes...Christmas!

2011-12-25T13:22:00.000-05:00

This Christmas has been great fun. We have two happy and contented boys (except when they are not ;-) and plenty of great food and gifts to go around. As I write this at about noon, Danny is having a fantastic a time doing "Mind Blowing Science" experiments with his Nana. Benji meanwhile is all about his pillow pet and his new Thomas the Tank Engine sleeping mat.

Thank you so much to all of our family and friends who sent gifts, but as you can see from one of the photos, next year you might be able to get by with sending only the bubble wrap. Popping those little bubbles provided at least a half an hour of great fun this morning!

Merry Christmas everyone.

Through the Eyes of a Child...

2011-12-22T14:40:00.002-05:00

This morning I had a really touching moment that I'm still thinking about. I was driving the boys to Jenni's and we were quietly listening to Christmas music on the radio. I was suddenly transported back to a year ago when my cell rang when I was at a Post Office with Benji. My sister Alice told me to hold on--I'd like this. Mom had been unable to speak at all in the preceding days when I was back home in Minnesota—after two hip breaks in one year, things had turned dire. And here she was, with Alice holding her cellphone to her ear speaking to me as I held tiny Benji, telling me she loved me. I was overwhelmed with joy in that moment.

So on the drive this morning I was thinking of that call and got lost in a reverie, remembering long ago Christmases with mom and just could not stop the tears from silently rolling down my face. I didn't look back at the boys at first as I didn't want them to see me cry. But two year old Benji was watching me. When I caught his eye in the rear view mirror after a while, he pointed to his eyes and put his head down. A few moments later, without a sound he looked up and his eyes were brimming with tears.

I was at once so moved by his amazing empathy but alarmed that he was so sad. Then Danny looked at Benji and asked me why Benji was crying. Then Benji burst out in tears. I told him that I thought Benji had seen me crying and that made him cry too. "Yeah" Benji wailed.

We talked about how sad I was that Grandma had died. I was trying to regain my composure when Danny gently told me that "Mommy at the end of your years you get to go to heaven to be with God". This choked me (and thus Benji) up even more. These boys. They soothe my soul.

When we got to Jenni's, she quickly got them excited about making ornaments and I was glad to see them happy again.

My brothers and sisters and I and all of our extended family are going to have these moments of intense sadness in the days to come. Mom died on Christmas Day last year and there is something very powerful about that. I will forever be grateful that she was alive and doing well when our children were born. I will be forever sad that she is no longer with us. But to paraphrase a wise 4 year old, at the end of my years, I’ll see her again. -Monica

Mom, my brother Paul, Danny, me and Benji two months before mom passed away.

Our Fitzgerald Children

2011-12-20T19:50:00.001-05:00

Fitzgerald Children, a photo by Bread for the City on Flickr.

Just in case you didn't know, our family has recently expanded!

Ok, actually, these are just the boys with their best friends and neighbors - Josie and Callagh. But we love them like family!

The picture was taken at Bread for the City's Holiday Photo Shoot. We particularly love this photo because it so fabulously captures each child's personality and the way they respond to directions!

Happy Birthday Benji!

2011-12-18T22:18:00.001-05:00

Benji seems to have had a great 2nd birthday:

After our traditional birthday breakfast at home, we headed to Union Station for the Holiday Train Show where we met friends and neighbors to see the trains and have some cupcakes! Thanks for a great party everyone.

Some memorable moments:

Being told that the Main Hall at Union Station and thus the train exhibit - setting for the party - was closed. :(

Discovering that the area was open afterall. :)

Benji's answer to "how old are you?": EIGHT!

The Handwritten Note--its power even in this internet age...

2011-12-08T15:34:00.001-05:00

When my dad lay dying in May of 2002 I remember having to get a little notebook to write stuff down in so I could keep everything straight. I titled it "my brain" because I remember feeling so overwhelmed that I simply could not think of what had to be taken care of. In so many respects, that time was a blur. I remember that the Lilly of the Valley's were blooming next to the house on the day of his funeral and that somehow I thought he would have like that.

My mom got so many flowers when he died that we couldn't help but joke that the dining room smelled like a flower shop or a funeral home. Call it gallows humor if you will. That's what I remember.

But in that blur, one memory stands out. I'd worked several years for an outstanding man who was a Senior Executive in the government. His name was Marty and I remember seeing an envelope on my desk the day I came back to work after my sad journey to Minnesota. This dear man had written me the most beautiful note. He wrote of parents and children and love and blessings and peace. When I saw him shortly thereafter he gave me the biggest hug. I will never forget the power of that note. Maybe because I didn't expect it. Or maybe because it spoke to me in such a personal and eloquent way. He brought me such peace and joy. And I'll never forget it.

Fast forward 8 years to last year at Christmastime, and then it was my beautiful mom who lay dying. I remember some of that same disorientation I felt with my dad's death. She died on Christmas Day, and as we've headed in Christmas 2011, I've been feeling strong moments of sadness about mom. Sad that I can't talk to her, sad that she is missing seeing my boys grow up. Feelings that Christmas will never be the same. Feelings that I can't even describe.

But then the other day our dear neighbors, Mary Elizabeth and Joe who are very spiritual and loving stopped by to drop some gifts off for St. Nicolas Day. When I opened a card they had addressed just to me, I could not speak. Tears rolled down my face. The power of the written word comforted me yet again. After reading it, somehow my anxiety is less and my connection to my mom stronger than ever right now. God bless you dear neighbors. Thank you for helping me enter into this Christmas season with more joy than pain right now. -Monica

It reads: Dear Monica, A candle is offered in memory of your mother at the Franciscan Monastery gardens--its light will shine there from Christmas until New Year's Eve--a reminder that your mother's light will continue to shine in your life--may her memory bring you only peace and joy. Joe and Mary Elizabeth

I'm just glad they can now "All Star Baby Wrestle" without me...

2011-12-03T08:08:00.000-05:00

Here are a few pics of the boys horsing around at Thanksgiving last week. With that holiday behind us, I will admit that I am finding it hard to wrap my head around the fact that the Christmas season is NOW. Today the boys and I are going to put the lights up on the porch. I love that they will be delighted by the whole process so I'll try my very best not to let them know that I really don't much like putting up (nor taking down) lights.

Then we'll be off to do a ton errands and get a visit from a dear old friend this afternoon. Come to think of it she might now appreciate me calling her old, so let's call her a dear friend.

Last weekend while in South Carolina we took Danny to see Arthur Christmas while Benji shopped with his Nana, and it was a really fun movie. Highly recommend. I was kind of shocked though that they charged $9 per adult ticket for an 11 am matinee. Not sure that is such a good business model though. There were a total of 5 people in the theater, 2 of whom were little kids. Maybe if they charged less more would come? Just my two cents.

Gotta run. I'm hearing crying that indicates that one of my All Star Baby wrestlers has a boo boo. Have a great weekend. -M

Strike a Pose...

2011-11-26T21:19:00.001-05:00

We are having a great time visiting the boys' grandmother in South Carolina for Thanksgiving.

As proud parents, we of course think that Danny and Benji are adorable enough to be catalog models, but, apparently we are not serious about this or else maybe we'd find pants that fit Benji and a shirt that fits Danny right?

Hope you all had a happy Thanksgiving and had plenty to give thanks for. As you can see, we sure did. -Monica

DC Department of Doh!

2011-11-21T16:14:00.000-05:00

This is a story of a little blue car. His name is Rondo, and when we bought him I wisely got a low interest loan from my Credit Union. After religiously paying off the loan for a few years, I got something called a "lien release letter".

This is a good thing. It means that the bank says that we are "Even Steven" and I can now get the title to little Rondo in my name.

After doing some research I got to this link where I learned that I would have to go in person into the Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV) to one of the Service Locations and give them the letter, some money (which my Credit Union covered after much discussion) and in about a week, they would mail me the new title.

Today I was in the area of the main DMV and brought everything along I needed. The woman at the information desk sighed in a bored voice and said "we can't do that here". Turns out that I'd have to go to a Service Center. Silly me. I tried to explain that the main DMV is listed under Service Locations on the web site regarding titles. I could tell my observation was of no interest to her. "You have to go to a Service Center she said again, waving on the next customer while shoving a brochure in my hand.

Turns out that on the DMV website if you go into each facility listed under Service Locations , you'll see a list of what you can and cannot do at each location--some of which are called Service Centers (which is not what the information about titling says). It's completely illogical in my opinion.

My transaction involved entering information into a system, accepting payment and issuing me a new title later. Why this cannot be technologically accommodated at the main DMV is beyond me. It's not like I expected them to whip up a title for me. I know that it's a process that takes time and new titles are mailed. But seriously? It feels more like 1984 than 2011 (and not in a good way).

So some fine day I'll go to a service center that the web site says can handle this transaction. I wonder what the problems I'll encounter there the day I go? I can only imagine.

Good thing we are not thinking of selling little Rondo. But I'd sure like to get his "birth certificate" with me listed as his owner. Is that too much to ask? -M

Someone takes getting his hair cut VERY seriously.

2011-11-13T09:28:00.000-05:00

But Benjamin recovered nicely as you can see.

Bring it on Old Man Autumn!

2011-11-13T09:15:00.000-05:00

Last weekend the boys enjoyed a little fun in the leaves when their Nana Ulli came for a visit. Looks like more fun on tap for today with all the wind we've had in the DC area this week. Probably twice as many leaves down as last week. They are going to be SO EXCITED! -M

11/11/11

2011-11-11T20:16:00.000-05:00

Every year on Veteran's Day I think of my dad. He pretty badly wanted out of a difficult life at home and managed to enlist at 16. Still not sure how he got away with that. He had terrible vision in one eye--Amblyopia I think it was called. It meant that the eye had a visual disorder but looked normal. When it came time to take the eye test he cleverly passed it. When they told him to cover one eye and read the chart he covered his right eye with his right hand. He did great. Then they told him to do the same with the other eye. He just used his left hand this time and covered up that same right eye. Again he did great. He must have really wanted into the service.

This all happened in the 1950s and before too long, before he met my mom, he was shipped overseas to Korea. As war was never declared against Korea--it was actually a police action, but if you asked my dad, he'd tell you it was a war.

I only ever remember catching bits and pieces about his experience there. I know he was a telegraph guy. Knew Morse Code perfectly and for the most part worked on intercepting messages. I recall that he sometimes had bad dreams and I don't know if it was true or I imagined that his angst came from having been in a truck when the driver was shot. If the driver had slammed right they all would have plunged off a cliff. But he slammed left and the rest survived. He was in the front cab as I recall the story going and it was pretty traumatic for him. Again, since he hardly ever talked about the "non-war war" I sometimes wonder if I imagined all this.

I do know for a fact that in the 1990s after the Korean War Memorial was built in Washington my dad came to visit and we went for a walk there. (I'm glad they don't call it the Korean Police Action Memorial) For those of you who don't know this memorial it's just a few steps from the Vietnam Memorial by the Lincoln Monument. He thought the artists did a great job of creating it. It's right near DCA National and very often you hear aircraft overhead. Spot on. Kind of startled him I'm pretty sure. He said that it was funny that most people think Korea was hot (maybe they confuse it with Vietnam, which by the way was also a police action as war was never declared) but he said it was SO cold all the time. That was his memory.

Dad figured he'd just stay in the military for his whole career but after he got married and us kids started coming along, I guess a better paying job was needed. He did stay in the reserves and every summer for two weeks he'd go train as well as several weekends a year. I was a kid in the 1960s and I think I remember mom worrying that dad might have to go to Vietnam but I'm grateful that that never happened. I'm sure he was too.

So on this 11th day of the 11th month of actually the 11th year of this century I salute my dad and all who have served. Like it says at the Korean War Memorial "Freedom Isn't Free". -Monica

My dad Joe a few years before he enlisted in the Army

Mommy, Benji's playing with his oatmeal...

2011-11-01T07:31:00.010-04:00

Mommy on her way into the dining room: "Danny, remember how we've talked about tattling? You only need to tell if someone is in danger or breaking someth..."

"Oh for the love of God Benjamin! Really? Really?"

I'm not sure if there was danger or anything being broken, but I'm kinda glad Danny alerted me to this. You know, before it got out of hand. -Monica

Hanging out with Great Grandpa in Germany

2011-10-30T21:26:00.000-04:00

It's hard to believe that it was just a few short weeks ago that we were in Germany. October is definitely a good time to head to that part of the world I must say. We enjoyed really pleasant weather and of course since it was October, we had a beer or two in honor of Octoberfest!

I thought I'd post a few pictures of the boys hanging out with their 91 year old grandfather. He's Susanne's Opa on her dad's side, so to the boys he's their Uropa. It was really fun to see both him and the boys so happy together.

It Was a Dark and Stormy Night

2011-10-30T15:39:00.000-04:00

My three favorite characters setting the mood set for a spooky Halloween. Scary!

It Was a "Snowshine Day" to paraphrase the Brady Bunch ;-)

2011-10-30T08:50:00.001-04:00

We got our first snow fall of the year yesterday and Danny and Benji were thrilled as you can see. Danny's hat is sort of a combination stegosaurus/porcupine hat that we got for him in Germany, and Benji's was perfect for Halloween weekend. A pumpkin hat we got from our friend Raquel when he was a tiny baby. He fills it quite nicely now and it will be perfect for this winter! Have a great Halloween everyone, and if stay warm!

Stopping the Madness!

2011-10-28T21:27:00.002-04:00

Growing up in an Irish American family I was very familiar with the word "whinging". It rhymes with "singeing" and what it means is to whine or fret. In a very annoying way.

As an adult I remember reading Angela's Ashes by Frank McCourt and being astounded to see him write the word "whinge." I'd never seen it written before which was sort of a shock.

Fast forward many years and here we are today. And we've got a whinger. His name is Daniel, and we have gotten a tad bit sick of the whining. (Our neighbor is from Ireland so his family uses the word quite a lot to describe their kids' high pitched complaining too.)

Anyway, a few days ago Susanne read some great advice on Baby Center or somewhere that a good way to stop the incessant whinging is to create a jar with say five whinge cards for the day in it, the last one attached to a treat. Every time the kid whinges you take a card out. The last one to come out if the one with the treat attached. However, if the kid can control him or herself enough, they get the treat. Each night you put your five whinge tickets back in and start over (always with a treat attached to one as the reward).

Bottom line--if we have to pull all 5 cards out each day before supper ends because he's been caught whinging 5 times he does not get his gummy bears. If we pull out 4 or fewer, he gets the bears.

We have been using this with pretty good success this past week as Danny is very keen on getting his Gummy Bear treat (we got the kind with Vitamin C so we feel like this is an okay thing.) He did not get his treat the first night we tried it, but has every other night (except one) and we are thrilled that the whinging has dropped off considerably.

Now if only we could figure out how to solve for the problem of Benji becoming apoplectic when Danny gets a treat and he does not. And also how to help Danny understand that whinging "BUT I'M NOT WHINGING" loses him a card. ;-)

Anyone else used this method, or think you'll try it? We give it a thumbs up! -Monica

More farm fun

2011-10-23T16:05:00.000-04:00

Continuing with my Wizard of Oz theme, I guess I would title this one "He would while away the hours".

The "scarecrows" on this farm we visited were actually pretty scary for most of the littler kids. But Danny thought this one was pretty silly. Enjoy the rest of the weekend everyone. -M

Representing the Lollypop Guild...

2011-10-22T17:40:00.000-04:00

The faces Benjamin can make right?

The boys had fun at a farm/pumpkin patch this morning, and as I type they are gleefully stabbing innocent pumpkins on the dining room table with Susanne. Ah yes. Tis that most spookiful time of the year...

Greetings loyal readers

2011-10-18T17:30:00.000-04:00

Well I know people continue to visit our blog because our cool widget on the sidebar shows the visitors. If not for that, I would guess we don't have any readers as we get so few comments, but that's okay. With the pathetic amount of writing I've been doing lately I'm surprised anyone still tunes in.

As you can tell, our two precious boys continue to dominate all of our time and energy. They are a handful (what little kids are not?) and even though at times I'd like to pull all of my red hair out, I don't. Mostly because if I did I'd look like a crazy woman!

Susanne and I are a good team when it comes to taking care of the day to day stuff, but at times we definitely have conflict over parenting. These conflicts generally occur in the middle of the night when I am, according to my lovely wife, too quick to jump to the call of a crying child. She believes that doing so only rewards the crying. The worst part about having disagreements in the moment, in the middle of the night, is that you can't talk about it. Especially if one of the crying boys is now sound asleep on the floor of our room. It's also worse when the boys are sick. It seems like torture to me to just let them cry if they are hurting.

I'm not saying that Susanne is wrong in her assessment. I'm just saying that it is exceptionally difficult for me to always know the best thing to do, even when everyone's interests are the same. The boys share a room so when one cries out loudly in the night, I want to do all I can to keep the other boy sleeping. Sometimes this means removing the offender to a different space. It doesn't help that Danny clings to me and hangs on when I try to comfort him.

I know that Susanne has a point, but I also think her threshold for listening to the boys cry and scream in the night is different than mine. So I am always wrong. Or at least that is how it feels. It also doesn't help that usually the boys tend to cry out for me (Mommy) and not her (Mama) which I know hurts her feelings. Sometimes, I feel like there is no right answer to some of this conflict.

So Benji just got the fever that Danny has spent the past few days dealing with. I'm not looking forward to this. -Monica

More good times in Germany

2011-10-13T14:00:00.001-04:00

Lots of fun with cousins everywhere we went as you can see here. The last picture is sort of a funny story. You see we'd gone to meet Su's friend Marcus at the main train station in Koblenz when we turned around to see what Benjamin was up to. Turns out his pants were not up to anything. The waist on these sweatpants had seemed a little stretched out but wearable. As it turns out we were wrong. Thank goodness for the "onsie" shirts. And thank goodness we had a suitcase filled with lots of other pants in the car parked not too far away. Will he ever forgive us when he's old enough to understand this post? ;-) -Monica

Traveling Abroad--The Good, The Bad and the...Yawn...

2011-10-11T12:02:00.001-04:00

As I mentioned in my last post, we went on a visit (for two weeks) to Germany for a family party. Su's aunt and her husband celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary, and just about every relative in the family made it to the gorgeous town of Buxtehude which is in the north near Hamburg. We also spent time with Su's 91 year old grandfather closer to Frankfurt which was wonderful.

I was so looking forward to this trip, in part because I was so looking forward to a break from my job. Getting all of our packing organized has become a bit more complex with the addition of our two boys, but how much extra stuff do you need for a 4 year old and a one year old munchkin? Turns out quite a lot. Car seats and many diapers, and snacks and toys/books and a DVD player for the rental car (what a blessing that turned out to by though!) Anyway, we got to the airport with time to spare and began our 7 hour direct flight to Frankfurt in good spirits.

The flight left at 3:45 local time and with the 6 hour time difference, we hoped they'd just sleep some and then sleep some more in the rental car. But alas, one year old Benji was the squirmiest worm ever--he was only happy when he was running laps around our section of the plane (so sorry fellow travelers). He had scant interest in the movies and shows on the little screen in front of him, nor in any snack, book or toy. When dinner came we hoped he'd be happy and eat then sleep, but somehow he managed to crawl under my legs with the dinner on the tray in its locked and downright position, and I could not catch him. Slapstick comedy ensued (not). Anyway, Su finally coaxed him to sleep and there was peace. Sort of.

Danny was super well behaved, but except for a one hour nap from about 4:00-5:00, he did not sleep. So for 23 of 24 hours he was awake. And talkative. And wanting to watch this and then that. And wanting to talk some more. It was a long flight.

When we arrived in Frankfurt at 5 am local time we hung out for about 1.5 hours waiting for Su's mom to come in on another flight. Benjamin ran around in a circle approximately 750 times. He would not be stopped. Danny started crashing. It was all great fun. After a nice breakfast with Su's mom (she stayed with the boys so we could get and load up the rental car) she went to meet her sister to take a train to the festivities, and we were off on the autobahn. You know, that winding German highway with no speed limits in many places?

When the gagging started in the back seat I was not sure who it was at first. It was poor Benji. One clean up stop later we were on the road again. Then he did it again. Another cleaning pit stop and then we wisely put a bib on him too.

You know, this sounds like a real downer of a trip right? But it wasn't! We had so much fun hanging out with cousins and other relatives. The boys were for the most part well behaved. The weather was lovely. But Su and I realized that we are hardly ever with our boys 24/7. And for this two week period we were. Everything was new and exciting to the boys and they loved, loved, loved, Patrick and Christoph and Toby and Lisa and Jonas and Jannis and Jonna and all their older German relatives too.

A friend on Facebook called vacationing with kids an "oblication". I like that. It's a lot of work. (There was also the peeing the pants incident on the return flight but who is counting?)

But I'm thrilled that suddenly Danny is interested in speaking German and wants Su to read to him in German. I'm glad that Benji charmed the heck out of everyone and that we'll hopefully see some of our cousins next year when they come to DC to visit us.

And I'm VERY glad to be home. But can't wait to go again in a few years. Yeah, I'm sort of crazy like that. ;-) -Monica

More to come on our great trip to Germany...

2011-10-06T16:00:00.000-04:00

Here Benji and his cousin Jannis said "cheese" in German for the camera!

Ask! Tell! This is a great day I say...

2011-09-20T15:42:00.000-04:00

Yes Beatle, it's okay now. As of today, the ban on US service members serving openly has been lifted. I am thrilled on so many levels. Even though I have no connection myself to the military (more a Peace Corps type) I was always outraged by the idiocy of making people hide their sexual orientation. So they were held to incredibly high standards of honesty and integrity in their military lives, but basically had to commit lies of commission and ommission to stay in.

In the early 2000's I volunteered for several years help run a big annual fundraising gala for the Service Members Defense Network (SLDN). I met so many great people--many of whom had been forced to leave jobs they loved. Can you imagine how painful that was for them? SLDN was a lifeline for so many over the years. Frightened servicemen and women could call annonymously to get confidential help and advice from lawyers. At the same time the organization worked tirelessly to move legislation to bring the ban to an end.

At one gala dinner I had the honor of hearing Pat Kutteles speak about the horrific murder of her son Barry Winchell because he was "different". The more I learned the sadder and madder I got.

A writer named Randy Shilts wrote a book I read about 10 years ago called "Conduct Unbecoming: Gays and Lesbians in the US Military". It really shocked and saddened me. I'll never forget learning about an Air Force Seargent named Leonard Matlovich. He died in 1983 and on his tombstone which he meant as a memorial to all gay veterans at Congressional Cemetary in DC, he arranged for the following inscription:

"When I was in the military they gave me a medal for killing two men, and a discharge for loving one."

Powerful right? I kinda hope that he and everyone who has been on the fatal receiving end of violence against gays in the military is smiling from heaven today.

So, today is a great day. There is more to do though. Being open is great but partners/spouses of gay service members don't get the same treatment as straight spouses. There will have to be wider scale changes for that to happen, but a day like today gives me hope.

So thank you everyone associated with SLDN, including Dixon and Michelle, Jeff, Lara, Allen...the list goes on. You done good! -Monica

Do you think he liked soccer?

2011-09-17T15:22:00.001-04:00

That would be a YES!

I really hate pictures of myself, but I'll make an exception...

2011-09-15T12:23:00.000-04:00

Yup, that's my left pinky. Nice right? And the best part is that it's been like this since I was about 15 years old when I broke it playing basketball. Never much bothered me til I wacked it on a picnic table this summer. Now it's pretty swollen and irritated. I do remember being able to bend it around in all directions and would joke that I had no bones in that middle joint, but I had no idea that the bones were so out of whack. Apparently the middle joint is hyperextended and the joint at the tip is flexing--both constantly fighting with each other to dominate. This is what happens when you mess with your tendons people.

Anyway, I learned yesterday from a doc that there is a name for this. It's called a Swan Neck deformity (kinda does look like a swan's neck right?) I'll see a hand specialist but I'm not inclined to want to have surgery. Even though it is more painful and annoying than before.

Sigh...now I'm afraid to get x-rays of any other parts of my body. What other surprises lurk under the surface? ;-)

-Monica

Halloween Shmalloween

2011-09-14T06:45:00.000-04:00

Why wait for October 31st to dress up? This weekend our neighbors threw an impromptu costume party for the kids. One Batman (the Dark Knight I think), one Super Girl, two Supermen, and a Pirate strike a pose here. Wonder Woman and Baby Skunk were there too, but obviously too fast to be captured on camera!

We are so lucky to have such a wonderful bunch of neighbors!

Say it ain't so!

2011-09-13T17:33:00.000-04:00

I'm not 100% sure, but I think that Benji actually managed to climb out of his crib last night. Susanne was next to him when he got his leg over and sort of reinserted him back in. He was having a fit because I was reading a story to his brother and not to him and was hell bent on breaking out!

I must admit I am dreading life when the crib no longer hold him. If I never blog again, it may be because I'm exhausted from chasing him down.

I think I was spoiled by the fact that Danny did not try to break out and transitioned to his "big boy bed" the month before Benji was born. Danny was about 2.5 years old (or 30 months old) at the time. Benji is 21 months old now. Sigh...

On a brighter note, here are a few observations I've made about our boys on Facebook over the past month or so. Enjoy!

August 15
So I've decided our boys eat like birds. The 4 year old like say, a hummingbird, and the 1 year old like um, maybe a pelican.

August 15
So little Danny caught a bit of the news last night hearing Rick Perry thunder that "Washington is broken!". Of course the poor kid asked immediately if our house was broken?, (no) then exactly what in Washington was broken? I will limit my political commentary here by saying "Politicians say the darndest things don't they?"

August 16
I told Danny that today was going to be a great day. He of course asked why, and I told him "because I said so" which made him really happy. Sadly, I think he's only ever heard those words said in a slightly more cranky and exasperated tone ;-)

August 22
So just when did the piñata become such a ubiquitous part of kids' birthday parties? Every party we've been too this summer (including Danny's I admit) has had one. I guess I sort of love the sharing of cultures part, but the sight of a dozen tiny boys and girls beating the stuffing out of defenseless pink princesses and other cartoon favorites while the adults clap in approval is kind of creepy no? (Danny's was a fish--cuz that's so much better right?)

August 26
I've decided that our Benjamin is an old soul. Wise beyond his year.

September 8
Danny woke up this morning all excited about the fact that winter is on its way (or at least he thinks so). When I asked him what he wanted for breakfast, I burst out laughing when he announced "Snow Flakes". This boy it too funny!

September 8
I find it ironic that the song little Benji asks for constantly is "Da, Da, Da" (think Volkswagen commercial song). It's a fun one, but it always cracks me up that the boy with two moms actually then says "da, da, da" more than "ma, ma, ma" ;-)

September 12
Danny, eying a convertible this weekend with its top down." Look mommy! That car has its head off!" Oops. He did it again ;-)

September 13
Danny wanted one his stuffed Dr. Suess toys while we read a story. Which one is it I asked--Hooey? Yertle? Nah..."you know mommy, that guy who stole Christmas!" Oh, that guy ;-)

My Favorite Bird Whisperer...

2011-09-08T15:10:00.000-04:00

We had a great time last week visiting Susanne's family, and one of the highlights was a trip to the Richmond Zoo.

At the bird sanctuary, while watching Su and the boys with the birdies, I was reminded of a time about 8 years ago when we had taken a trip to Guatemala. One morning at breakfast, out of the blue, a gorgeous parrot decided that Su was his best friend.

Nice to see her passing on her gentle way with birds and animals to Benji and Danny. -M

I swear I just blinked my eye...

2011-09-06T22:48:00.000-04:00

A year ago Danny was just about the littlest guy in the school. An adorable 3 year old. This year he's just about the most adorable guy in the school. This time a big 4 year old. It is an amazing thing to witness this transformation. Of course baby brother Benji who is only 1 totally wants in on this growing thing!

Great day!

2011-09-05T11:00:00.002-04:00

So today I celebrate one of those non-milestone birthdays and I couldn't be happier. Last night we hosted a "Mojitofest" for a group of wonderful friends and today Susanne has been great--I most especially appreciate that she took Danny and Benji out for a while this morning to play at a park and buy me balloons (Spiderman and Mickey Mouse go figure :-) The 2 hours of peace and quiet to read the paper was priceless.

Last night as we were going to sleep I spied a perfect half moon, and as it was my last day of being 50, I decided that it was an omen that my life was only half over (or half begun!) and I'd live to be 100. Danny will be 53 then and Benjamin 51. Hard to imagine.

Which reminds me...we just figured out the other day that they will be members of the high school classes of 2025 and 2028 respectively. For some reason that boggles my mind. Have a great day everyone! -M

P.S. Tomorrow is the first day of PK4 for Danny. I wonder if he'll get butterflies in his stomach like I always used to?

It takes a village...

2011-08-28T11:30:00.000-04:00

sdf

It takes a village to deal with the clean up from Hurricane Irene. Our neighbors had a lovely pear tree come down but we are all grateful that no one and nothing was really damaged (thanks to a great catch by a smaller dogwood tree in their yard.) Onward and upward. Earthquake then Hurricane. What next? -M

Can you guess Benjamin's latest favorite word???

2011-08-25T16:34:00.000-04:00

Susanne took these picture in the spring of 2009 when Benji's big brother was on a bit of a locomotive kick. How many times a day do YOU think a one year old can yell "TRAIN!!!!!"?

Milestones...

2011-08-24T16:09:00.001-04:00

I know that usually we think of milestones as being those big moments like graduating or getting married or whatever, but I got to thinking about milestones just the other day when our dear Daniel, crossed a threshold I wondered if I'd ever see.

You see, he left his beloved blanket at our friend and day care provider extraordinaire Jenni’s house on Monday, and we didn’t discover this until bedtime. And truth be told, traveling the 10 miles to Jenni’s house (especially when she would be trying to get her own boys to sleep) to get the blanket did not seem like a very good idea to either Susanne or me.

Let me tell you about Danny’s blanket. It’s purple and he got it as a gift from Su’s mom’s friends Peggy and Mike. He has loved that blanket since day one, and as soon as he could talk, he called it his “bye”. (Funny story, Benji now has not one, but two favorite blankets that he calls “bye” and “buh bye”.) Anyway, where was I? Danny loves his bye and has slept with it every night since he was old enough to claim it as his own.

So, he asked and we told him he could take it to Jenni's, but that it was his responsibility to remember to take it home. Because let's face it, my brain is full and I was pretty sure I would not remember.

Anyway, fast forward to bedtime when he normally curls up on one of our laps with his bye, his sucking thumb (a whole nother blog post) and a good story, he asked us where his bye was.

Rut roh. Trying to quell the wave of panic that began to wash over me, Su and I both explained that he was going to have to use a different bye (like the one he uses at school). We braced for the worst.

He calmly told us which little blanket he wanted and proceeded to go to bed with no fuss.

I gotta tell you. We were really proud of him.

And I also gotta tell you I’m glad he forgot it on Monday night and not Tuesday night. Because that unusual east coast earthquake that hit yesterday shook him up a bit. From the moment we picked him up at Jenni’s he kept that bye with him until he finally drifted off to sleep. And milestone or not, I completely understand that when you’re a little on edge, it’s nice to have an “old friend” to hold on to.

Here’s to all of our purple byes.

August showers bring...

2011-08-17T21:06:00.000-04:00

Who knew? Apparently that "having enough sense to come in out of the rain" thing has to be taught. But in their defense, after surviving a summer this hot, a cool rain shower was just the ticket! -M

On Target

2011-08-16T14:22:00.000-04:00

So my thought for the day? Target.

As in Target stores.

You are probably wondering whether I plan to rant or rave, but in reality, I don't plan to do either. I really just want to make an observation that has stuck in my mind for a while now--ever since I was in a Target store when my mom was nearing the end of her life.

You see, I can remember Target stores since I was a little kid growing up in Minnesota. I actually worked at T-52 back when I was in college (for those who have ever worked at Target, you might know where that is.) The very first Target to ever open (T-1) is in Minnesota and if you were a kid growing up in the Twin Cities back in the '70s you probably went to Target.

So here is what I got to thinking about. Target changes all the time but never really changes. You go in, and the women's clothes tend to be on your right, belt and hats on the left, and if you're going to buy jewerly or a watch you go to that same glassed in case as you do in every other Target.

The colors never change either (don't ever accidently wear tan pants and a red shirt to shop at Target. You will regret it.)

To be sure, Target always has the stuff you need. The right clothes that are more or less in style. The latest toys. Again, always new stuff, but in most respects just like the old stuff.

So where am I going with all this? As my mom lay dying and I stepped out to take a break and get some Christmas presents, it dawned on me that Target was the same in 2010 as it had been in 1977. Still clean and sparkly and current. And maybe it's morbid of me to think so, but I just feel like when my time comes in 20 or 30 years, Target will still be the same.

And for some reason that makes me feel sad. But also kind of glad about this idea that some things never change--not really. Maybe it's a bit like how I see myself. Changing all the time, but in essense never really changing at all. I guess you could say I'm "on target". -M

Our Supermen

2011-08-09T10:22:00.001-04:00

Able to leap tall couch couch cushions in a single bound. Cuz jumping on the couch is a great idea right? ;-)

Birthday fun with friends

2011-08-07T13:02:00.000-04:00

Adorable little RJ celebrated her second birthday yesterday and pictured here is her ever so cool posse. Happy birthday sweetie! We had a great time. -M

Keeping it Real. Real Fun.

2011-08-05T22:16:00.000-04:00

The boys' Nana spent the week with us, and here keeps Danny entertained until reinforcements arrive!

Just in the nick of time Benji (who now weighs just a few lbs. less than D) takes over teeter totter duty.

Both boys had a great time riding a choo choo, and at the petting zoo. Here Benji prepares to engage in mortal "staredown" with any and all comers in the animal kingdom.

No contest you cute little turkey. No contest whatsoever!

In a nutshell...

2011-08-01T09:20:00.001-04:00

If I were not on Facebook I would most likely have blogged about these things that ended up instead as FB posts. Enjoy, or if you are a "friend" and have already seen them, move along ;-)

July 28

So Danny worries that our smoke detector is going to wail as I deal with a smoky “cooking malfunction.” “Don’t worry sweetie, it won’t go off now” I reassure him. “Won’t go off?” “Does that mean it will go on?” Aww… Chalk it up as another vote for “nuture” in the great “nature, nurture” debate.

July 27

When asked a question at breakfast this morning Danny replied "I can't answer you now--I'm not supposed to talk with my mouth full". Of course it came out as "Ah ca ansa you na--ah na suose ta ta wi my mow fu."

July 26

Our 4 year old delights in stacking and building--our 1 year old in searching and destroying. Sigh...

July 20

So last night as I carried Benji up, his little Glo Worm began playing a snippet of Pachelbel’s Canon. As I gazed as sweet face I suddenly imagined a day far in the future—his wedding day. I'm pretty sure I “wedding marched/glided” the rest of the way. And got a bit misty eyed. Such a sap!!

July 15

Rule #234 for a happy life. All gift cards must immediatly go into wallet. (Still hoping what appears to be lost will be found!)

July 14

Although Benji is too young to speak it's like he and big brother Danny actually plan how they will take turns each night making "night night" time a royal pain. Benji is "on" tonight, sigh…

July 11

Ugh...I've got the body of a God. Unfortunately it's Buddah!

July 1

Thunder and lightning--I always have to think before I say which is which. I also have a problem deciding which is the "open or close" button on elevators. :-)

June 30

Okay, seriously--who decides what to put out as XYZ (insert name of cable outlet here) breaking news e-mails? I know I could always unsubscribe, but I do count on the occasional really interesting one.

June 20

Sometimes a crib is just a crib. But when your 18 month old is particularly cranky some days, I like to think of it as a Self Contained Unruly Baby Apparatus. Yes, that's SCUBA for short. ;-)

June 15

Don't you think they could invent store video monitors that subracted ten lbs. instead of adding ten? I'd shop more at that kind of store.

June 14

"Afterday". Hmm...this new word our 4 year old has come up with is really growing on me. See you afterday!

June 8

Oh children's songs! Why do you infect me with your insidious brain worms? "Five little ducks went out one day, over the hills and far away." My apologies to parents of young ones everywhere!

June 7

"Ocean fish are for eating and goldfish are for loving" -Danny's deep thought while admiring his new orange friend.

May 25

Sigh...does anyone else dread figuring out what to wear to work every day? My entire clothing collection is a wardrobe malfunction I'm afraid.

Three Simple Steps...

2011-07-29T14:15:00.000-04:00

Ahh…children’s television. We like the PBS and Disney stuff but darn if those tunes don’t get stuck in my head and eventually drive me crazy!

Most likely anyone with preschoolers out there will recognize the "three simple steps" I titled this post. Yes, Secret Agent Oso is a cartoon where a cute bear teaches kids how to do just about anything by breaking it down into three simple steps. Tooth brushing, tying shoes, you name it.

Which always sort of humors me because in essence, as those of us who work in project management or enterprise architecture well know, decomposing anything down into its smallest "atomic" components is how you create work packages in a plan or...oh my gosh...what gobbledygook--just do what Secret Agent Oso says.

Have you ever noticed that kid's TV shows nowadays are all about teaching? None of this Roadrunner and Coyote, drop anvils on each other’s head stuff.

No. Today, Curious George teaches us all about how to measure and think critically. Sid the Science Kid? You guessed it. You can learn all about observations and formulating and then proving your hypothesis. Imagination Movers is all about solving problems too, and of course Mickey Mouse is about figuring out the best tools to do the job (and practice your counting while you are at it!)

I read once that the Flintstones was an ode to “The Honeymooner” which was Jackie Gleason’s show. “To the Moon Alice” Ralph would rail, much like Fred did to Wilma on the cartoon. I don’t recall much educational value, but maybe there was. After all, we learned how to lie and scheme our way out of problems that we ourselves caused, (but never really got away with.)

So I guess in closing, what I’m getting at is that if those of us who grew up in the ‘60s and ‘70s were influenced by TV and turned out the way we did, how will today’s kids turn out?

I guess if I thought about it hard enough, I could break it down into three simple steps.

Or could I? -M

Stay cool boys. Real cool.

2011-07-19T20:57:00.000-04:00

Dumbageddon

2011-07-19T13:05:00.001-04:00

Have you ever wondered how "blogging" became a verb? (Okay, a gerund as I wrote it.) But my point is that the word blog came out of the idea of writing a web log. If it had been an internet log we'd all be tlogging right? Words are fun! Like Staycation and Frienemies. Who comes up with this stuff? I guess all of us do.

In fact, just yesterday day I told Susanne that I was finding the whole debt ceiling debacle to be a clear case of "Dumbageddon". (Need I say who which party in the negotiations epitomizes pure dumbness?)

Well, I guess I'd better sign off an get back to my stupid job. Which I may just start calling djob. Although if truth be told, I'm grateful that I have my djob. In this economy. Thanks to the dummies leading us to Dumbageddon. -M

Happy Birthdays!

2011-07-15T20:43:00.000-04:00

Today is my sister Mary's birthday and tomorrow will be my brother Paul's. I've been thinking about them both a lot the past few days as their birthdays have approached and I hope they both have fantastic days. I don't talk to either of them super often, but we all know that we love each other.

When I called Mary's cell today, I asked if I'd caught her at work, and then felt rather stupid about my question when she reminded me that she had traveled to see her daughter and that she would be at her grandchild's baptism this weekend. You see, I knew that. She'd mentioned on FB how excited she was to be going to see them. And then I realized my problem.

You see, for my whole life, I and my siblings had the most amazing gift. The 411. Access to all information that was important to keep up with. And the source was our mom.

It's been just about 7 months since mom died. And although I didn't think much about the role she played in being our "glue" when she was alive and well, I think about it now. Even though I spent most of my life living in distant cities, mom and I spoke at least once a week, often more. She loved to keep me (and all of us) up to date on the latest family news (okay, gossip.) Sometimes she'd forget she'd already told you something but you didn't mind because, hey, you knew she was sharing that same story with at least 7 children, 4 grown up grandchildren and various assorted other relatives.

If mom were healthy and still with us, she'd have made sure I knew where Mary was and most likely would have reminded me to call her. I'd hear the whole story about baby Ellie's baptism and Paulie's birthday too.

My sister Alice who took such wonderful care of mom is sort of taking over mom's 411 role a bit. Maybe I think that because just like mom was always the hub for our many spokes, Alice is now the one that everyone checks in with (especially the brothers who my mom worried most about.) But Alice has a busy life and can't possibly play the role that mom did, and she does not need to. No one else ever really could anyway..

Mom, if you can hear me typing, I hope you know that you made life fun. And interesting. And I miss you. -M

What I did on my summer vacation...

2011-07-09T08:00:00.000-04:00

Danny had a wonderful time visiting his grandmother in South Carolina as you can see from these pics. It does make me wonder though how easy it must be to get a license to captain a boat. Those passengers look far too comfortable to me at the prospect of a four year old taking them on a tour of Lake Marion! -M

A Parade Worth Waiting For!

2011-07-08T11:25:00.002-04:00

The Takoma Park 4th of July parade delighted both Danny and Benji. Who doesn't love a parade! -M

The Dog Days indeed...

2011-07-05T14:40:00.000-04:00

I have decided that I'm not a big fan of summer. Heat, mosquitos, humidity. Need I go on?

I used to like summers better when I was a kid because, well, I didn't have to go to school in the summer. I didn't dislike school so much, but I just got sick of it. Summers were a healthy break.

But for some reason my employers seem to believe that summers off are not good for the soul. I disagree.

In thinking about this I guess that I'm mostly not liking this summer, because I'm not much liking my job. I guess self-awareness is the first step to solving a problem.

Thank goodness my children bring me such joy. If only I had the summer off to enjoy it more with them. Sigh. -Monica

Oh where oh where has my big brother gone?

2011-06-25T19:49:00.001-04:00

Benji has officially had enough of being an only child. Danny's been at Nana's for six straight days now, and Benji is finally ready for the "Big D" to get home.

His brother has had a FABULOUS time per Susanne who is with him now at Nana's in South Carolina, but she too thinks it may be time to head home. Apparently Danny's conversation with Benji on the phone tonight was along the lines of "it's been really fun at Nana's but it's boring" (I will add that he's not been bored a moment. It's just that he's missing Benjamin). We'll have to see how long this "Philadelphia" (City of Brotherly Love) lasts.

I know that I cannot wait to hug and kiss my precious four year old tomorrow night (even though Benji and I have had great fun alone these past few days.)

Can't wait til tomorrow. Love, Mommy

And the Walkin' Man Walks...

2011-06-23T21:25:00.000-04:00

Our tiny time traveler...

2011-06-21T17:01:00.000-04:00

Well he is sort of tiny. And he did travel for a long time yesterday.

Yes, Danny and his grandmother started their big week-long adventure yesterday by boarding a train in DC at around 10 am that, after a bit of delay, arrived at their destination in South Carolina at around 7 pm. Then they had the hour drive to Nana's house.

He had a blast! He was so excited to talk to us on the phone when they got home and sounded so happy. What was I worried about?

Benji however did not seem to have gotten the memo that our evening "night night" routines were to be easy peasy with Danny gone for a few nights. It's like he drank a few Red Bulls or something. Argh! Maybe tonight will be better? I sure hope.

Anyway, here is a cell phone pic of my our excited traveler minutes before boarding. Oh the places you'll go little Daniel. Oh the places you'll go! Love, your Moms

A family affair...

2011-06-21T14:46:00.000-04:00

Presenting my newest cousin and his adorable family together with ours this weekend. As you may recall from some previous blog entries, I got a surpise about a month ago when I got a phone call out of the blue from a man who was trying to track down birth mom after his birth certificate had been unsealed.

Lo and behold, although it was not widely known in the family, my dad's sister had indeed had a child in the 1960s and had given him up for adoption. He's a really nice guy (as is his family) and although we won't see them too often as they don't live nearby, we hope to stay connected. His visit to his birth mom (and to his birth dad whom he also amazingly tracked down) went pretty well.

Welcome cousin! -Monica

Project Goldfish has been a big success...

2011-06-17T07:26:00.002-04:00

The Unbearable Lightness of Being (without Danny for awhile)

2011-06-15T17:20:00.001-04:00

Well Danny is four and tomorrow is his last day of school. He started as the smallest 3 year old in the bunch and although he's grown, so have all the other munchkins, so he's now one of the smallest 4 year olds in the class. He's had a wonderful year at school. He can write some letters (he's very good at "D" and "A" now), and counts perfectly in Spanish. He's learned lots of songs and made wonderful friends. He's also developed a strong soccer kick, and has started having an opinion about the clothes he wears.

I've been most pleased with the smiley faces and "great day" notes that his teachers send home just about every day. Our goals this year were to see if he could write his name, dress himself, and not get so frustrated the second he can't figure something out. He's succeeded on all three fronts and we are so proud of him.

What words describe him? Witty, sweet, homebody, book lover, picky eater. Yup. That's him. And about a zillion other words.

So what's with the title of my post? Well, you see, he has about a week off between school ending and summer "camp", so he's taking a little trip with his Nana. They will take an Amtrak train from DC to South Carolina next week, and although Su will be going down later in the week to spend time there and bring him back, I won't see him for seven whole days.

You'd think I'd be rejoicing at no bedtime dilly dallying and the noise level dropping a few decibles. But no. I have a feeling a day without Danny will be like a day without sunshine. Can parents get separation anxiety? Just glad he'll be with his Nana where he'll be very happy and comfortable. But I'm gonna miss him... sigh...

I also think the boys will miss each other. I guess on the bright side, Benji might come to really like this "only child" syndrome that he's never experienced before. Only time will tell. -M

Visting family in Richmond = Great fun for all!

2011-06-13T13:50:00.000-04:00

We took a quick trip to visit Su's dad (Pop Pop) and family in Richmond this weekend and as you can see, all the kids had a wonderful time. Let the games begin! -M

I really will blog again...I promise!

2011-06-09T12:17:00.000-04:00

Wow. I can't believe I haven't posted in so long. So, where were we in the saga called life?

Well, my long lost cousin I wrote about is going to meet both his birth mother and birth father this weekend. Turns out he's quite the slueth. These two knew each other for a short time in the 1960s but did not stay in touch. He'll be meeting them both seperately and I like to think of this as sort of a fun soap opera. I hope it goes well for all involved!

I don't know if I mentioned that a goldfish we got for Danny on his birthday died about an hour after he got it. Seems there is something called "new fish tank syndrome" or something like that. We got some new stuff to add to our water and it passed some chemical tests so his second fish has been doing well for the past week. Wish us luck. It was no fun for anyone when fish #1 went to "swim with the fishies". On a positive note, both boys love our new fish.

Well, that's just about all I have time for today. I promise to keep up better in the future. Have a great day, and stay cool if you live here in the Northeast! -M

Danny's Awesome 4th Birthday!

2011-05-29T22:15:00.000-04:00

Guess Who LOVED the BEACH?

2011-05-22T22:34:00.000-04:00

Have I ever mentioned that I'm an overexaggerator?

2011-05-17T15:07:00.000-04:00

Word to the wise. If you persist in telling your three year old that you are going to go to "Yertle the Turtle Beach" for vacation, there may be some MILD disappointment when you arrive at plain old Myrtle Beach.

Only time will tell I guess.

I have a distinct feeling however that I soon may be "Queen of the Mud". -M

P.S. Actually overeggagerate is not a word. It's an exaggeration of the word exaggerate. Oh my...

The Very Curious Case of a Newfound Cousin

2011-05-17T09:18:00.003-04:00

As one of my favorite philosophers once said “Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get”. (And yes it is perfectly fine to claim a make believe movie character as a favorite philosopher.)

Anyway where was I? Oh, right. So last Monday evening, I got a call on my cell when I was at a music class with Su and the boys from the 508 area code.

I immediately took the call because to me the 508 area code means one thing—Boston. And when I get a call from Boston, it usually means one thing. My only living aunt on my dad’s side has had a fall or something at the nursing home where she lives. (My aunt really has no other close relatives left besides me and my siblings and I’m the one who has stayed closest to her).

Well it wasn’t the nursing home calling, but the call did have something to do with my aunt. Seems when Massachusetts changed some laws in the past few years, it became possible for people who had been given up for adoption to get their hands on their birth certificates which before then had been sealed.

I was in shock as the man on the other end asked me if I had any idea how he could locate the name of the birth mother listed on his birth certificate (I have the same last name as my aunt and his internet sleuthing had given him a hunch to call the numbers he found for me.)

The funny thing is that if he’d have called me several years ago, I would not have had any idea what he was talking about. But through a series of events a few years ago, I had learned that she’d given birth to a boy in the late 1960s whom she’d given up for adoption. Now I was talking to him.

I must admit I was in shock. (He was in more shock though to have found someone who knew how to reach her!)

I’ll make a long story short. He’s a very nice guy that has done very well for himself. He’s got a wonderful family (they have two young kids) and a job with lots of travel and responsibilities. I actually got to meet him face to face the other day for lunch which was great!

And now, in a few hours, for the first time ever, he’s going to talk to his birth mom on the phone.

The nursing home staff has been wonderful. When I called them after learning this shocking news they strategized first before talking to her about it so she'd have the support she needed if this was going to be too overwhelming for her. She’d kept this secret a long time after all. But after saying "wow" she also thought it was really interesting and wants to talk to him and hopefully meet him.

I don’t know if he’ll find all the answers he’s looking for. My aunt is a bit of a “character” and has some mental health issues that make it hard to know how she’ll deal with stuff or even what she’ll say.

But I find myself so rooting for this connection (reconnection) to be a good one for both of them.

More than anything I’m just very grateful that he is healthy and has had a good life. I think that every mom who makes that painful decision to put up her child for adoption wishes for nothing more than that.

And when all is said and done, I know is that my siblings and I feel like we’ve gained some nice new cousins out of all this. Curious case indeed. -M

I'll admit there is some bias here...

2011-05-14T13:57:00.000-04:00

In 2007 we met a wonderful couple in a Birth Works class who were due at the same time that we were. In May our little Danny was born, and a few weeks later Jenni and Nelson's adorable Oscar came into the world. They were both cuter than any of our hearts could ever have imagined.

Our families are so fortunate to be very close to this day as Jenni has been our day care provider extraordinaire for the past 3+ years. Arguably our blogs are filled with a gazillion of photos of every moment of Danny and Oscar's blossoming lives.

Then, as is wont to happen, both of our families were double blessed by the births of second children. Ironically both sons, and not so ironically, perfect! Miles was born in December of 2008 and our Benji almost exactly one year later.

The other day Jenni shared this wonderful photo of these two buddies doing what they do best--just being.

Amazing that is.

I've decided that if I'm ever having a down day I'll come back to this post and look closely at this picture. I find it impossible to keep from grinning ear to ear.

Have a great weekend everybody, and thanks for this great pic Jenni! -Monica

Silly times in a fishbowl "ball pit"

2011-05-10T08:00:00.000-04:00

This last photo of Benji's lower half and Danny's upper half cracks me up. Have a great day! -M

It's All in the Iris of the Beholder...

2011-05-09T14:56:00.001-04:00

Random thoughts for a Friday

2011-05-06T11:59:00.002-04:00

1. If you were "The Donald" and had all the money in the world, would you wear your hair the way he does?

2. Every night before taking Danny into the boys' room for a "night night" story (where Benji is already sleeping) we review the rules. "No talking to Benji, no touching the crib and no touching Benji." So last night when I asked what the rules were, without missing a beat Danny replied "No sleeping". Oye.

3. "Troth" means faith or loyalty when pledged in a solemn agreement or undertaking. Just in case you meant to look it up after the Royal Wedding but had not yet gotten to it.

4. When news broke on Sunday night of the Navy Seal raid that got Bin Laden, for some reason I imagined that the president had been sleeping and was awakened with the news. I was shocked later to see that he'd been in the Situation Room and everything. I guess I thought that we'd been looking for Bin Laden for 10 years and that this was bound to happen sooner or later. Didn't realize that this was such a specialized operation.

5. This will be my first Mother's Day without my mom. I could never have imagined last spring that she'd no longer be with us now. On the other hand, it's her first Mother's Day in heaven. I'm sure it will be heavenly ;-)

6. This is Danny's first Mother's Day as a student. We are interested to see how his pre-K teachers will deal with the two moms thing. Great we think. This cartoon from the New Yorker really hit the nail on the head don't you agree?

7. Has anyone seen my druthers? If only I had my druthers...

Have a great weekend, and Happy Mother's Day indeed to all mothers everywhere! -M

Really Danny? Really?

2011-05-03T11:18:00.000-04:00

Almost 4 year old Daniel insisted the other day that he could fit into his 1 year old brother's overalls. After all, Mickey Mouse is awesome right? About 15 minutes later he let me know that it was time to put on a pair of his own pants. Still cracking me up after all these years ;-) -M

What a difference a day makes...

2011-04-25T16:36:00.003-04:00

Benji likes his new haircut. What do you think? ;-)

Happy Easter

2011-04-22T12:11:00.001-04:00

We are looking forward to a beautiful Easter here in DC. The forecast calls for warm sunshine and that makes me so happy.

I've been thinking about my Mom as we approach this blessed day. Mom dying on Christmas Day was sort of "bizarro world" or something for me. After all, on Christmas Day we celebrate the birth of the Christ Child and it's traditionally a day of joy and celebration of new life. I know in many ways that her death was an entry into new life so it should make more sense to me, but it is what it is. I don't know how I can ever know another Christmas without some sense of mourning.

Which brings us to Easter. The three days leading up to Christ's death and then his rising on Easter are much more aligned to the mourning that I mentioned. On some level I know that when Mom was dying, her suffering and pain (and ours to watch her decline) were relatively small in relation to what Christ went through for us. But it still hurts terribly to think about that time.

Mom was a faith filled person though, and so am I. Which makes me sense that the joy of this Easter will feel more intense and beautiful than any I've ever known. I know I'll sense her presence, and feel her spirit rising which is a wonderful feeling.

This Easter too I have the unexpected pleasure of being able to join our Church choir in singing a peice of music that I've loved since I sang it in high school. It's called the Vivaldi Gloria. I've gone to several rehearsals and something about singing with a choir again is awakening in me a part of my "self" that has been asleep for a long time.

This probably won't make sense, but I keep thinking of "imprinting". Imprinting is a term that describes how animals decide "who they are". I think that my early connection to singing in really good choirs through school imprinted in me a real comfort--a sense of fit. I feel so comfortable standing and holding music, breathing correctly, sight reading, listening to blend well, counting measures and following a good conductor

But when I think about the things I've learned as an adult, I don't feel like those things come to me so automatically. Take Project Management for instance. I am a certified PM and can definitely lead, but I always have to review again how to write a new charter or how to use the tools I'll need. Not with music. It's like second nature.

Makes me want my boys to follow wherever their hearts lead them and give them every opportunity to find their true happiness. Danny already loves music (especially drumming and strumming a guitar) so much. I'm really happy that Su found a fun music class we can all go to for the next few months!

Anyway, I'm sort of rambling now. Sorry. Happy Easter everyone. Hope it's a shiny happy day for you! -Monica

Our Boys of Summer...

2011-04-20T12:56:00.001-04:00

Our two little guys love to be outside now whenever they can. And after a long winter, you'd think I'd be equally as enthusiastic about it, but the truth of the matter is, I don't much like being outside. I never really have.

Maybe it's my fair skin and all those painful sunburns I got as a kid. Or maybe it's the flies and mosquitos in the summer and the crunchy sticks and stuff that falls off trees that make it near impossible for me to comfortably go around with bare feet. I don't know. I just know that I appreciate the cool comfort of the house if I have a choice.

But you know what? Knowing how much the boys love it outside, I'm going to figure out how to love it a little more myself.

After all, Danny and Benji adore being out on the tree swing, and in the sandbox, and running up and down the sidewalk with their little friends so much. And I do love sports, so playing catch or kicking a soccer ball or shooting at our little basketball hoop won't kill me. And chatting with our neighbors is always a pleasure.

Our yard out front is small and abuts a circle which is great in terms of having a pretty low volume of traffic, but who am I kidding? Traffic is traffic and when you have a three year old and a free range toddler outside with no fence, you can't really just relax. At least I can't.

I like to believe that as time goes by I won't feel the need to be quite as vigilant--in fact I'm sure it will get easier for me. (Stop snickering now.)

So where does that leave me? Well, outside with the boys when we have fair weather until I have to be "that" mom who makes them finally come in to eat supper and get ready for bed.

Hmmm...or maybe I can be the mom who stays inside and makes supper while Su stays out with them! Why oh why does she have to be the good cook in the family ;-( -Monica

April showers'll bring May flowers, but first these little sprouts... ;-)

2011-04-18T14:26:00.000-04:00

It's like we gave up washing their faces for lent...

2011-04-16T08:53:00.000-04:00

Snip and Snails and Salamander Tails...

2011-04-12T21:30:00.001-04:00

Danny and the whole family had a great time this weekend hanging out in West Virginia with some friends from our church. Fortunately the rain let up so we got a chance to do some exploring. We asked Danny on the way home though what his favorite part of the trip was though and he said "sleeping in the car on the way home".

Must have forgotten about the thrill of discovering the salamander and spider egg sac as well as his "plunge" into the tiny creek and pretend fishing at the waterfall. But he's probably right about the nap. After a few days out in nature, our little city boy was pretty tuckered out. Already looking forward to heading out there again! -M

Criticism Catcher

2011-04-11T16:15:00.000-04:00

The other night as I was drifting off to sleep I was thinking about how very easy it is for me to criticize people. And you know what? I don't like that I do it one bit.

I like to think I'm pretty sneaky about it though. I mean, I don't say just anything to anyone, and in fact, one strategy that I have is to just share them with Susanne.

How much fun can that be for her?

I also like to think that I find "good" words to say critical things. For example, I'll say that someone is "high strung" instead of saying that they are "annoying", which is really just being critical anyway.

So as I drifted off to sleep that night I imagined a big Dream Catcher to catch all my critical comments before they pop out of my mouth.

I've "caught" 4 pretty mean comments since then. I like it when imagery works for me. I hope this one sticks! Monica

P.S. Also, calling a neighbor "crazy "insert name here" is a really bad idea. Cuz remember, three year olds think that that is the person's name and they will tend to say "hi" accordingly!

Uncle Neily

2011-04-04T21:09:00.000-04:00

So this weekend Danny stared whining about how he wanted his "Uncle Neily". I thought that was pretty sweet since Uncle lives far away and Danny doesn't see him often. But the more I questioned him the more frustrated he got until I realized that he was telling me that he wanted his "Ukulele". We'd just bought him a real ukulele and he is in love with it. Sorry Danny. I'll try to listen better next time. Oh and Uncle Neily...he wants you too. Time to come for a visit! -M

Just to clarify...

2011-04-02T07:04:00.000-04:00

I showed Danny yesterday's post with the picture he drew of his "favorite animal". He thought it was great and the best part was that when I asked him if he knew that a pool wasn't an animal he looked at me and said "mom, there's an animal IN the pool".

Apparently there is a monkey in there somewhere. So he says ;-) (Pretty good answer though if I do say so myself!) -M

I'm so proud. I think.

2011-04-01T15:26:00.000-04:00

I have a few more months to use the "he's only three" card right? ;-)

Boys will be, well, you know...

2011-03-30T11:05:00.000-04:00

Aren't they angelic?

Oh, maybe not so much...

Sorting through mom’s things (a trip to the brain dump)

2011-03-29T16:16:00.001-04:00

This weekend I flew to Minnesota and spent many hours with my sister Alice systematically sorting through our mom’s possessions—packing things to donate, filling trash bags with things that were no longer needed, and talking a lot about both our mom and dad as we paused often to reflect on their lives and our loss.

It was tiring—pretty much equally emotionally and physically. I was going to write more about this but somehow I just don’t feel like it.

Work goes well. Susanne and the boys are fine. Spring is coming. Just wish I could pick up the phone and talk to mom about everything. -M

Come on Spring. You know you want to stay...

2011-03-23T22:21:00.000-04:00

What a Shame...

2011-03-17T17:58:00.000-04:00

Today I attended the funeral Mass of the husband of a co-worker. He died very unexpectedly a week ago and he was clearly very much loved by many as hundreds of people poured into his family's Catholic Church to say goodbye.

The priest, bless his heart, started off by welcoming everyone and saying something along the lines that although many people of different faiths were in the space he knew that the Christian love was a common bond that tied many of us together as we gathered to celebrate this man's life.

That was all fine and good and the service was touching, but then I couldn't help but feel shocked when it came time for communion. The priest had to explain to the roughly 500 mourners that the only people who were welcome to the table were those who were Catholic and who did not have grave sin in their hearts. The crowd began to murmur. Clearly a huge majority of mainly African-American mourners were not Catholic.

He pleaded with them to please understand that the Church was working very hard to change this--it didn't seem particularly right to him either I could tell. He did stress that Catholics believe that the Eucharist is not just a symbol--it is the actual body and blood of Jesus so not just anyone could receive it. He lamely invited anyone who wanted a blessing, to come up with their hands folded in front of them a certain way and he or a deacon would bless them. I don't think anyone took him up on that offer.

You know, although I am no longer Catholic, I have not been excommunicated from the Church and believe you me, the fact that I am gay, in no way to me is a grave sin (or any kind of sin at all). I don't believe that God made any mistake with me. But I hesitated. Why? I don't know exactly, but after about one second of thinking, I went up to receive communion.

But I was mostly saddened that out of the 500 mourners only about 20 of us went up to take communion. It just seemed so sad. Like watching discrimination in action. Later a preacher who grew up with the man who died gave testimony and it was like night in day. He spoke of the awesome power of Jesus to console and teach us, comfort us, love us.

Night and day.

-M

Mama got a new phone for her birthday....Benji too!

2011-03-14T09:46:00.000-04:00

We think he knows that this is a cardboard phone... ;-)

Apparently you can be too clean...

2011-03-10T19:13:00.000-05:00

Benji got a little ahead of himself tonight and inserted himself head-first into the tub a little before his time.

As we like to say around here "OH MY!"

March Showers Bring May Flowers (or something like that)

2011-03-10T15:22:00.000-05:00

Here are a few of my favorite flower pics Susanne has taken in recent years just to make this rainy day seem oh so worth it somehow! -M

Come on spring!

Da agony of da teeth ;-(

2011-03-09T15:28:00.001-05:00

Well I don't know if we both just have short memories, or if Benji's pain with his molars coming in is just so much worse for him that it was for Danny.

This poor little boy. Two nights in a row now he's continued to wake up, crying. Arching, writhing, hitting...the poor guy is basically out of his mind with pain.

Last night we even did a preemptive strike with Tylenol before bedtime and it was as if we'd given him nothing. We finally used an infant type of topical numbing stuff for his gums. Tonight we'll try frozen bananas, ice cubes in a washcloth--whatever will work. We'll also try Ibuprofen to see if that works better for him.

I wish I could tell him that this is all done now, but I have no idea how long this will last.

I've decided that this is the one downside to being a mom. Watching your child suffer while feeling helpless. I'm praying tonight will be a peaceful one for him. -M

Our little soy boy...

2011-03-08T14:47:00.000-05:00

Jenni guessed correctly that my art below was Benji. He was wearing a dark jacket with the hood up and a lighter colored vest. I think his face is pretty distinctive and I love the grin because although he is generally a happy little guy, when he scowls, he scowls!

We recently realized one reason for his periodic crankiness--turns out he may well be allergic to dairy. About a month ago after a week of him feeling sick and being really stopped up (yup on that end) we took him to Su's chiropractor who specializes in pregnant women and kids. She treated him with some stong yet gentle massages of his lower back and face, and strongly recommended that we try switching him to soy.

The results were pretty dramatic. He started sleeping better in the mornings after his typical crack of dawn bottle. And he just seemed happier. As the chiropractor told us "you'd be cranky too if you were constantly ingesting something that made you feel sick."

After a few weeks we tried to introduce some easily digestible dairy in the form of yogurt back into his diet but he immediately got stopped up and crankier again. So we'll hold off. Our doctor agrees that this might be an allergy. Some kids grow out of them so we'll just have to see what happens. In any case, he loves the organic soy milk which is HUGE. (Can you imagine if he didn't like it? Ugh!)

So, sweet as he can be, he certainly lets it be known when he is unhappy with any decision you may have made. But he's got a grin to die for, and when he's sleepy he's the cuddliest guy around.

He and Danny are quite the team. And we have a feeling they are just getting warmed up!

Have a great day everyone! -Monica

Just for fun...guess who?

2011-03-07T20:38:00.000-05:00

Happy Choo Choo Birthday!!!!

2011-03-03T07:52:00.001-05:00

Happy Birthday Susanne!

2011-03-02T17:04:00.000-05:00

Is it really almost March 3rd again tomorrow? Well, then, tonight's the night Danny and I will make a special cake for Mama and the boys and I will "surprise" her in the morning with gifts and candles and song at the breakfast table.

It's so fun to see how Danny is excited yet a little jealous that this celebration if for Mama instead of for him. But he's especially psyched that his Nana will arrive from out of town tomorrow. It think it's great that Susanne's mom will be with her to celebrate her special day. I don't know if it's because my Mom passed away a few months ago or what, but I am finding myself feeling very pleased that Susanne gets the chance to share special moments like these with her Mom.

Our celebrations include fondu night with the family on Su's birthday and the next day a party with neighbors. I think we are going to have a splendid birthday party and wonderful weekend for my dear wife.

Honey, my wish for you is that this is the most fantastic birthday you have ever had. Love you sugar pie! -Monica

Make Way for Babies!

2011-03-01T09:33:00.000-05:00

For those of you who know me in real life, you know that we have a really dear friend named Luis who I first met about 10 years ago when we started working together. He is one of our Danny's Godfathers (lucky boy has 2 Godfathers), and well anyway, Luis and his partner Steve decided, a few years ago, that they wanted to start a family. It took some time, but through the grace of God they are now fathers to three gorgeous little boys--Joaquin is about 10 weeks old, and twins Alex and Reggie are about 6 weeks old.

Their story is unique and I highly recommend you check out their blog called 2Men3Babies (it's also listed on our blog roll).

Well the exciting news is that they should be returning sometime later this month from the country of India where the IVF and labor and delivery took place. (Oh and all that stuff in between the IVF and the labor--bless the women who carried these dear children).

I think I'll let some of Luis's words from his blog speak for themselves. This is from a letter he wrote to his oldest son a few days after Joaquin was born--before Luis or Steve had even met him...

Joaquin,

Where do I start? What do I say first? You are 9 days old today and I have not yet had the opportunity to see you, hold you, or tell you how much I love you. Daddy Steve is leaving tomorrow to be with you and I will soon follow. I was talking about you today and it was suggested that I write you a letter. Although I know that you can't yet read my words I pray that you can feel your Dad's love all the way over there as I count the moments until I can hold you in my arms.

When Daddy Steve arrives I am sending him with the fabric chord that has held the cross that I bought when Steve and I first departed to India to begin this journey. I will ask Steve to take a piece of this chord and tie it around your little ankle or wrist so that you have a little part of me with you and know how much I want to be there with you. When your siblings arrive in a few weeks I will take the remaining chord and will divide the remainder and finalize the sharing of the chord that has held all of my hopes and dreams of you and our family.

Speaking of our family, there may be those who will be confused or even question how it is that your daddies used a "non-traditional" way to bring you into their lives. I want you to know that you were born in the most fundamentally traditional way, out of our love for one another. Your daddies so loved each other that they wanted to expand that love and share that with you. We had a number of Angels who helped in bringing you to us.

Son, I vow that I will try to be the best man that I can be for you and our family. My heart is filled with such love and hope for you. We are so happy that you are part of our lives and only ask that you continue to grow strong and healthy. On the eve before Steve leaves to be with you and at the end of the year 2010, I look towards the new year and I pray for continued blessings and health.

Isn't that the sweetest letter you ever saw? I can't wait to see their little family of five soon! Have a great day everyone! -M

Here is a pic from Danny's baptism. Luis is right behind Susanne with the glasses and green tie.

Ch, ch, ch, cha...changes!

2011-02-25T11:13:00.001-05:00

I know I don't really write much about my work on this blog, and that's kind of on purpose. But I will say I work for a large federal agency, and like I've said for a long time, it's not my "life's work" but as my life's work is my wonderful family, I find it pays the bills quite well and it truth be told, I actually like doing most of the work I do.

But on Monday I will actually start a new job. It's at the same agency but with a completely different organization. I've certainly changed jobs in my life in the past, but I find this transition odder than most, because the reason I'm making the change is because I've grown, how shall I say this? "disenchanted" with some people high above my pay grade in this place. I would never burn any bridges and say bad things about

any colleagues--that wouldn't be prudent (but if you've noticed I've left some space in between this line and the one above it. Feel free to read between those lines ;-)

My biggest angst though comes from the fact that my direct supervisor is awesome. Kind, caring, intelligent--she's an amazing mentor and I respect her with just about every ounce of my being. So it will be hard to no longer work for her. I do take solace in the fact that my new job will have overlap with some work she manages in my current organization so I will work with her again. And there is always coffee to be enjoyed on breaks from time to time.

So, transition time has come. I don't much like change. Who does? But this really is a positive move for me. Onward and upward! -M

Boys and their toys...

2011-02-24T17:33:00.001-05:00

Mommy Tales...

2011-02-23T08:00:00.054-05:00

I’ve recently decided, as my memory fades in my twilight years (okay, being a little dramatic here), that I'd capture for your reading pleasure (and our sons’ edification someday) periodic "Mommy Tales".

These tales will span the decades, and story number one goes back to 1987.

The setting was a steamy summer day in Antigua, Guatemala. I was in my first month of training as a Peace Corps Volunteer and had just learned a very interesting fact in my training class. You see in Guatemala (as in many other parts of the world apparently) there is the concept called the “evil eye”.

This is usually some negative spirit from a stranger that can bring danger to little babies in particular. Often parents have some tricks up their sleeve to guard against the evil eye. In fact I remember my Peace Corps friend Carrie even sharing that her mother (who is of Italian heritage) hung garlic behind her crib for this reason and that her dad had no idea. He just thought baby Carrie stunk for the first few months of her life! Her mom eventually fessed up, but I digress.

Anyway, so back to this steamy day in Guatemala. I’d just learned all about this “evil eye” which in Spanish is called “mal ojo”. Parents there painted a little red circle on their infant’s head to protect them from any evil out there. "How fascinating" I remember thinking.

Well, later that day I got on a crowded bus with some of my Peace Corps buddies, and lo and behold, I spied an adorable infant with a red circle. I was so excited!

So of course I began excitedly pointing at the baby’s head while loudly exclaiming in my terrible Spanish, “Look! Look! Evil Eye! Evil Eye! That little baby right there has the Evil Eye thing!”

You guessed it. Apparently seeing a gringa, redheaded stranger pointing and loudly shouting “mal ojo! mal ojo!” caused a some gasping and panic on the bus. To my credit, I realized immediately that I’d done something wrong, so I shut right up and dropped my head down to look as contrite and sorry as I possibly could.

Then my friends who spoke fluent Spanish smoothed things over by explaining something along the lines that I was just learning and was a little excitable. Thank goodness.

Truth be told though, I’ve never been able to quite shake the feeling though that they may have communicated something more along the lines that I had a super low IQ or something like that.

Ah well. Lesson learned. Think. Think some more. Then speak. Maybe. -M

Mommy with Peace Corps friends Mary Ellen, David, Liz and Jon a long, long time ago while serving as a Peace Corps Volunteer in Guatemala.

Must be a "mergency!"

2011-02-22T09:21:00.001-05:00

This weekend we traveled to Boston, and the highlight of our trip was a personal tour of the largest firehouse in the city by none other than a real life fire captain! I guess it comes in handy being friends with one of Boston's finest (firefighters are finest too right?)

Benji had fun grabbing any ropes he could get his hands on, and Danny just grinned a lot and kept saying "wow!" In particular he loved the two fire poles that the firefighters slide down on from the living quarters above!

A special shout out to my friend Leah and Captain Mark and their son Mike for giving us the tour, but also for taking care of all of our photography needs as well as we forgot our camera (thanks Mike! Great job!)

-Monica

P.S. Danny was pretty relieved that a real fire alarm didn't go off in the station while we were there. Now that would have been a real 'mergency. A three year old's heart coming to a complete stop and all!

Head scratcher...

2011-02-16T10:14:00.000-05:00

So the other night while visiting with neighbors, Danny burst out into that old familiar chant "We will, we will, rock you!" "We will, we will, rock you!"

As he started to sing I thought to myself "aw, he must have learned that in school. How adorable."

Then my "aw" turned to a bit of shock when I realized what he was actually singing sounded an awful lot like "We will, we will, judge you!" "We will, we will, judge you!"

All four adults in the room looked at each other quizzically and of course we asked him to sing it again. Again, it sure did sound like he was doing his best Myers-Briggs Judging thing.

He insisted he was singing "rock--just like rockstar mom!" But all of our ears beg to differ.

What next? Sha na na na, sha na na na, hey, hey, hey eat pie!"? -M

To my Valentine

2011-02-14T09:27:00.000-05:00

Dear Susanne,

Some days are harder than others. Clothes and dishes to wash, food to prepare, little boys to focus on--and then all of the other many errands to do and decisions to make. And for the most part we do these things on little sleep thanks to our two early risers.

But I just want you to know that underneath all the mundane and all of the weariness, I hold in my heart for you a love that never stops burning. Yes, I'm sure that sometimes it must seem like that fire is just the tiniest ember struggling to keep smoldering. But smolder it does Susanne.

And just when I least expect it, I'll catch your eye from across a room, or collapse next to you on the couch at the end of a long day, and I am transported back to those early days of our life together. The giddiness and joy and wonder of you.

I guess I'm saying, even though I don't always show you how much I love you, I need you to know how very much I do.

Love, Monica

Crying Uncle! (Or is it Laughing Uncle?)

2011-02-09T16:19:00.000-05:00

A surprise visit from Uncle Paul sure makes Benji's day as you can see in this pic. Even though Paul lives in Minnesota and we live in DC, the perk of working for a major airline makes it possible for him to come here fairly frequently.

Both Danny and Benji are delighted to have Uncle around--although I will say that I felt a twinge of jealously that Paul seemed to put Danny to bed so easily last night.

But then I thought "hey, I'm not the one putting him to bed! Wahoo!" Presto, no more jealously!

So thanks for coming Paul. We always love it when you come to see us! -M

File under the category of "Really?"

2011-02-07T15:38:00.000-05:00

So I couldn't help but notice that our new box of Q-Tips (I mean cotton swabs that one can compare to Q-Tips), that the instructions on the box come with a big CAUTION!!!!!

Apparently you are not supposed to let the swab enter your ear canal--just gently swab around the outer surface of the ear.

Huh?

That seems a little nutty to me. I mean, don't jam it down to your ear drum, but for gosh sakes, really?

On the bright side the box does say that you can use them for makeup application and blending, touching up nail polish, cleaning electronics and delicate baby care. Also for arts, crafts and hobbies.

Looks like somebody got sued once and our litigious society stepped in to make sure that no new earwax was ever removed, with permission, by one of their swabs.

Shessshhh! Maybe one day someone will sue for deafness attributed to copious amounts of buildup? Don't laugh! ;-)

BALL!

2011-02-05T12:28:00.000-05:00

The official first word? Well... he also says ba ba (bottle).

And They Call it, Pop Pop Love...

2011-02-04T09:04:00.001-05:00

P.S. They were just playing! No actual grandfathers were injured in the making of this blog post. Oh, and although it looks like Danny took a swing, he actually just tickled and ducked ;-)