Ten months old already? Danny, you're our joy!

It's that most wonderful time of the year...

The first baby gift we ever got was from our friend Amy and her family. They gave us the softest, sweetest baby blanket with puppy dogs that, to this day, lives in Danny's crib. He loves it. But the best part was the card where little six year old Alice wrote something like "Baby, you're the Charm!"

Is that not so sweet? And she was oh so right. (It's uncanny how she knew our baby would be a charm when Su hadn't even reached her 8th week of pregnancy yet!)

Yes, Alice. Danny is a charm. And not just our charm--turns out he's a charm for the Washington Nationals too. Last year we took him to 6 games and they won all six. (This pic to the left was taken at the Nat's final game at RFK in September.)

So Saturday night, the Nationals will play the Baltimore Orioles in an exhibition game at our brand new Nationals Stadium. We'll be there with "the Charm" and can't wait. Maybe if they keep winning the Nationals will start paying us to go?

No pressure Danny. No pressure. Just keep being your charming self! -Monica

Five things I know...

5. Nine month old Danny is figuring me and Susanne out. I wonder if someday he’ll share with us what he knows?

4. When I hang up the phone I always say “See you soon.” Everybody else says “See you later”. It must be my audacity of hope.

3. That even though my wife and I have the same sized feet, we do not have the same shaped feet. This means that we can never wear each others Birkenstocks. Never. (I learned that the bloody hard way. Literally.)

2. When the financial markets are doing poorly, we’re simply “buying low”. The same $$ that comes out of our paychecks now buys more shares than before. And those additional shares will eventually be worth more—like for our retirement. Or so I assuage myself.

and...drumroll please...

1. That I really don’t want a blue bird of happiness to land on my shoulder. As romantic as that may sound, in reality, if any bird landed on my shoulder I’d probably die of a heart attack.

-Monica

Cheese Danny!

Do you know Wallace and Gromit? Well if you don't, I highly recommend watching a few episodes of those wacky characters. Being quite the cheese lover myself, I particularly admire their love of cheese! "Cheese Gromit!", silly Wallace always says to his silent but clever dog.

This weekend when we gave Danny a little appetizer of equal parts bread and cheese before he had his real supper, he carefully ate all the yogurt cheese cubes first before digging into his bread. "Cheese Danny!" and I thought "how wonderful!"

I must add that my happy feelings about W&G are related peripherally to my dad. He used to watch it with his then 2 year old granddaughter Janna when he was undergoing chemotherapy and his head looked amazingly like Wallace's bald head. Poppi and Janna thought it was hilarious. He'd be so proud of his cheese eating number one grandson! It's hard to believe it's been almost six years now since dad passed away. I'm glad that memories like this make me smile now rather than feel that sharp pain I felt for so long.

Dad, you'd really have loved this little guy. He's got a little fat head and is the happiest baby in the whole wide world. Yes, I know that sounds cheesy, but the rest of the family knows exactly what I mean ;-) - Love, Monica

In the eye of the beholder...

Thank you Susanne for always seeming to capture beauty wherever we go.

For me, there is nothing like a flower in bloom to remind me of the beauty of Easter. Have a wonderful weekend everyone. I hope it's glorious! -Monica

Rut Roh!

Stepping off the scale this morning, I had a revelation that in the almost 10 months since Danny’s birth, he and I have gained the same amount of weight—pretty much in tandem.


Hmmm…thinking thinking...

OH CRAP! –Monica

Rainy Days and Sundays...

On Sunday we had a great time hanging out with dear friends Tracy and Natalie who live in a beautiful place in Maryland. We had planned a picnic, but with all the rain we got the night before, we decided to stay in for our picnic--it was fabulous!

Funny thing is that I can remember a night several years ago before Susanne and I ever started going out, enjoying a fun evening hanging out with Tracy and Nat at Susanne's house because rain had canceled other plans. That night we roasted marshmallows over candles in the living room and had so much fun. Wow, it's pretty amazing to imagine how our lives have changed so much from that time. Amazing and wonderful.

Anyway, this time with 9 month old Danny we hung out in front of a real fire at Tracy and Nats. We later fashioned a "pack and play" or maybe I should call it a "fort" out of pillows so he could nap a bit, but instead of napping he kept rolling from side to side and laughing. Exploring, 10 points - Napping, 0 points!

Anyway, later did get a chance to go for a walk and swing at the playground. He thought they had an amazing pool outside the house, but we explained to him that it was actually the Chesapeake Bay. Thanks for such a fun and relaxing Sunday friends! -Monica and Su and Danny

We Can and We Will!

On Saturday morning we had to go to the DC Department of Motor Vehicles to get Su's driver's license renewed since they expire here every 5 years, so Danny and I hung out in the car to wait while she went inside.

Looking out the window toward nearby Anthony Bowen Elementary School, Danny internalized the school's awesome motto which is "We Can and We Will" (which is fabulously similar to a current presidential candidate's motto.) He also had a great time watching with delight as the window fogged up EVERY TIME he breathed! Isn't it a beautiful thing to watch babies learn?

I on the other hand simply learned that we really need to wash our car. Look at those windows will ya? -Monica

Whoa!

"The squirrels here at grandpa's house are way cooler than the ones at our house moms!"

Cat got your...?

So one night this week I was trying to tidy up the living room. While doing so, I noticed that our baby cat CJ had parked herself in our recycling basket. I then tried to coax her out so that I could dump in some new stuff, but she wouldn't budge.

Not wanting to lose face in this "war of wills" with baby cat, I began to gently deposit the papers anyway. So, I guess I "won". She stayed this way for another hour.


My questions are these. Is this normal? And, will I need to take a parenting class before engaging in any battle of wills with Danny? -Monica

Just a walk in the park...

Three generations smile for the camera on our trip to visit Danny's grandpa yesterday. "Say cheese!"

It's like watching "the reveal"!

This week I got an e-mail from my wonderful niece Missy who is excitedly expecting her first child. She and her husband David are thrilled, and in her e-mail she sent along a picture of the 12 week ultrasound picture of their little one. I found that I was really excited to study it and see if I could imagine what their little boy or girl will look like. (He or she undoubtedly will be beautiful with such gorgeous parents.)

Anyway, the whole thing got me thinking about our little guy. Could we have imagined what our little Danny could look like just from an ultrasound?

I don't think we scanned our 12 week one, but perhaps this one is more telling anyway. What do you think? Here he is at 7 months "en utero ", and again today at 9 months. I don't know about you all, but I'm totally seeing it!


Oh, and while I've got my squirmy worm on my lap right now, he'd like to say a few words...

jmnnyuyjhlkk n gn m87nh

Have a great weekend everybody! -Monica (and Su and Danny)

Arizona Dreaming...

A few years ago Su and I visited some of my Peace Corps buddies in Arizona. The first two pics were taken in Sedona. It was gorgeous of course. But one of our favorite pics was taken on an old country road between Meadview and Kingman. This tumbleweed was bigger than our rental car, so we stopped and snapped this shot out the window before it started moving again.

We're planning a trip back to see Dennis and Ruth this fall. You don't think we'll need to worry about a toddler exploring the wonderful world of the desert do you? ;-)

Cookie Scene Investigation

So even though today is my usual telework day, I had to go into the building for a few hours to host some high school students who came to my federal agency to learn more about careers in IT. We had fun, and when they finished up and got on their big yellow bus, I hop, skipped, and jumped down to the Metro to join Susanne at home. Since I'd left her with Danny alone all morning (when she had a ton to do for work) I thought I might be able to make amends by also stopping at Au Bon Pain to get her favorite macaroon cookies which are dipped in chocolate.

Later in the afternoon we ate them while while tapping away on our laptops and I have a VAGUE recollection of a little bit of my cookie falling off somewhere. Apparently the yummy and gooey crumbs fell landed on my shirt. How did we come to realize this? Well, apparently with my excellent parenting skills, I'd picked up, hugged and toted Danny around quite a few times between eating my macaroon and finding more macarron. In his mouth.

Yes, there was a transfer from my shirt to his little outfit. I may have even noticed this dark brown splotch, but figured it was a cute little puppy or something. But then Su spotted him eating his "puppy". In my defense, he seemed really happy.

He is also starting to move around all over the place. He pulled himself up from laying down to standing up in his crib, so now the matress has been placed way down to its very lowest level. And most frighteningly, he was on the wood floor in our office (which is pretty slippery and slick) and somehow slid himself half way across the room on his butt. He found a really fun thing to pull on which turned out to be the cord to our iron (which was unwisely placed on a high shelf with the cord hanging down.) I almost had a heart attack. This laptop is lucky to still be functioning. That's how quickly I tossed it aside and got to that iron. He hadn't pulled it yet, but was VERY close. No more time now to wait on any childproofing measures now.

Alrighty then. Time to start dinner. Maybe something coco nutty? -M

Tick Tock Tick Tock

I'm not watching the clock... Oh wait, now I am...

Snot gonna happen...

If only it were possible to temporarily remove Danny's nose from his face to give him saline drops or suction it out. Our poor boy has been super congested for about 3 days now. No fever, but lots of snot which we know has to keep moving. So we use the vaporizer, the Pedia Care plug ins etc...but sometimes you just have to reach for the saline spray and suction bulb

We've learned that Danny is very fast, very determined, and very much not in favor of us trying any of the things listed above.

He's like a awesome hockey goalie when it comes to blocking us. If we don't have his arms securely tucked under our armpits while bracing his beautiful little unhappy face, he's gotten both mitts up in time more than once. That while pinning him into a reverse quarter nelson. (Okay we don't really use wrestling holds on him.)

I've stayed home with him today and I think he seems to be breathing better. Let's hope so. One thing I'll say for Danny though, when he's sick, and you're not trying to shove strange things up his nose, he does tend to still be a smiley boy. Speaking of the smiley boy, I can hear him now just waking up from his nap so I guess I'll sign off.

Maybe we'll get him a Mr. Potato head for his birthday. He has a removable nose and seems quite happy with it! -Monica

Oh...Pruning!

Mommy and I are watching mama outside who is on a ladder doing something they call "pruning" to our tree. Hmmm...I guess that must be where they get all those prunes for me. "Okay mama, you've been outside long enough! Come back in now!" -Love, Danny

Good old fashioned fun!

In this corner, weighing in at 17 pounds 0 ounces, Danny the Danosaur....

And in the other corner, coming in at 19 pound 2 ounces the infamous Oscarelli!

Isn't it great that the boys have so much fun every day? I especially love the use of practical toys like plastic bowls. Next thing you know, they'll be outside with friends playing "sandlot" baseball where there are no adults around to umpire. Brilliant I say!

Jenni, thanks for sending us this and the other fun pics of the boys. We are so blessed to be able to leave our baby--our most treasured Danny--in your capable care 3 days a week.

Have a great day everybody!!!! -Monica

Who knew!

One beautiful March day in the early 1970s something really amazing happened on the edge of the Black Forest...my beautiful Susanne came into the world.

What was I doing that day? Let's see? Probably nothing special. She was born around 5 pm German time so it was late morning in Minnesota. I was 13 years old and on that crisp Sunday morning I'm sure I was on my bike delivering the St. Paul Pioneer Press to everyone on my paper route. How could I have known then that in that magical window of time, the most amazing, wonderful sweetheart, who would one day become the love of my life, was being welcomed into into the world half a world away?

It was the best day of my life and I didn't even know it! Well I know it now. I love you honey.

--Happy Birthday from your Monica and our little boy Danny

The "real" deal...

Before I forget, let me start this post by pointing everyone to our delightful little guy’s 9 month slide show. Yup, he's 9 months old today. Have I ever told you what joy he brings us? What a boy!

Anyway, about the title here. The “real” deal. Yesterday for the very first time since Danny was born I felt pretty marginalized. Here’s what happened.

Danny got his Social Security card right after he was born because we needed it to get him a passport to take him to Germany. When he was born he had to carry Susanne’s last name because DC law says that the baby has to carry either the mother’s or the father’s, and, well, Danny’s got two moms. So his name at birth was Daniel (My last name) (Su’s Last Name).

Okay. When we started adoption proceedings we had the option to include a request for a name change which was great because we'd already decided to change his name. Upon his adoption, his name became Daniel (Su’s last name) (My last name). Are you with me so far?

So at 6 months the adoption was completed and the court ordered DC to produce a new birth certificate listing his new name and both parents (Parent one and Parent two.) Once we got that document, all we needed to do was take his old Social Security Card, his old and new birth certificates and our adoption decree (true test stamped copy) to Social Security.

Which we did yesterday at lunchtime.

The woman (Ms. T.) who did our intake was really, really puzzled. She’d never seen a second parent adoption. I didn’t sense any kind of maliciousness or homophobia, but here’s sort of how part of our conversation went:

Ms. T: (to me) “are you his mother?”

Me: "Yes"

Ms. T: (to Su) “and you are???”

Su: “I’m his mother too.”

Ms. T: "So who is his real mother?"

Su: "We are both his real mothers."

Ms. T: “You both adopted him?”

Me: “No, only I had to adopt him, Su gave birth to him.”

Ms. T. (to Su) “Aha! So you’re his real mother.”

Su and I together: “No, we are both his real mothers.”

Blank look, confusion, wandering off to find a supervisor.

Part of her problem was that the federal form we needed to fill out only has lines for mother and father. So we’d put my information on the “father” line. We wanted to make sure that as his legal parent, Danny’s social security number was linked to mine. It could make all the difference if I were to die or become disabled since he is truly my dependent too.

Turns out they needed to send our file to Philadelphia to have their legal people “look at it”. Apparently there is no problem getting Danny’s name changed on a new card, it’s this issue of a state (or in our case a District) issuing a ruling (on my legal adoption of my son) and how the federal government will act on that ruling.

I can’t imagine we are a test case. There have been A LOT of second parent adoptions so there must be a precedent right? We got a call today from Ms. T. letting us know that she “was able to go ahead and process our request.”

Ms. T. also called me Mabel at one point in her confusion. Mabel? Maybe she can just refer to me the “Velveteen” Mommy ;-)

Have a great weekend everyone. We’ve got a big birthday weekend planned starting tomorrow for Danny’s “other” mother. Happy birthday sweetheart! -Monica

Happy 9 months baby Daniel!

Weighing on my mind...

What’s on my mind today? Clutter. Stuff. Never ending tasks.

Maybe it’s human nature to get everything all cleaned up and then slowly descend into the maddening hell that is “mess” and start all over again.

I guess this is how Sisyphus must have felt. You know, Sisyphus—the guy who the gods had condemned to ceaselessly rolling a rock to the top of a mountain, and once he got to the top the stone would fall back of its own weight. The gods had the idea that there would me no more dreadful punishment than futile and hopeless labor. Those sound like smart gods to me.

My best friend from high school came out to visit us this weekend (along with her family which included an adorable four month old granddaughter named Audrey.) Anyway, Terilyn and I totally strolled down memory lane and basically spent the whole weekend cracking up. This woman is seriously funny. And wonderful.

But one of the things we talked about was her memory of how no one could ever come to visit and play at my family’s house. I hadn't thought about that in a long time. Gosh, we grew up in a very chaotic world with 7 kids all about a year apart and a few of my brothers were very destructive. I remembered well the shame about anyone seeing our house. I also remember that our mom was ALWAYS cleaning and that the place was ALWAYS a disaster. I can’t imagine how frustrating it must have been for her.

Today Su and I live in a beautiful, organized house. But I still have some of those same feelings of discomfort and shame when people come over. Even if it's NOT messy.

Now that's messed up.

We actually pay a very nice woman to come ever two weeks and really give the place a top to bottom cleaning. She’s awesome, and I shudder to think what our bathrooms (and the house in general) would look like without her help. I should just shut up and be grateful I know.

But the real kicker is that we still have so much to do every day to keep things organized and neat. Cats and food shopping, and trash and dishes and laundry and making various appointments (oh and caring for our beautiful infant son.) And that’s before I even write my “to do” list. Thank God for Susanne I tell you.

And another thing. I swear I watched a movie in elementary school that promised that by the year 2000 robots would take care of everything. Liars! So the point of my post is that I’m sometimes I feel overwhelmed. I think I’d prefer to just feel “whelmed”. I may need a dose of my Susanax. ;-) -Monica

That's one way of looking at it...

This morning Su was printing something at home and the cursor was being very sensitive. It didn't seem to want to do the print function and she said that the computer wouldn't "give her the finger". I thought this was pretty funny until she told me that if you think about it, the computer basically "gives you the finger all the time". Now that is funny! ;-) -Monica

(Roll your cursor over the finger to the left here and you'll see what I mean.)

Snowy Day...Everything was, A OK!

Su took these on Wednesday afternoon. Tonight we might get some real snow. Gee...in that case, we may be able to actually slide on the sled! -Monica

It's all about the hat...

A few weeks ago our friends Nelson and Jenni introduced us to a wonderful brunch place in College Park, MD called the 94th Aero Squadron Restaurant. It was very fun and we look forward to many more brunches there with Oscar and his mom and dad.

Anyway, it's on an old but still active airstrip, and has a real WWII sort of theme. They even have some vintage airplanes out front. We liked it so well that we recently went back there when we had some out of town visitors. Su's dad snapped several cute photos of his little grandson.

So...is it just me, or do you think that Danny looks a bit like Rocky?

(That being said, it goes without saying that Susanne is WAY cuter then Bullwinkle ;-)

Have a wonderful weekend everybody! -Monica

If a picture's worth a thousand words...

then how many words are two pictures worth?

Nuestra Marimba

Aww...doesn't Danny look impressed? Here he is with Richard and Wes who, ironically, have always been "the little ones" to most of us, since they are both the babies in their respective families. They're teenagers (or is it tweenagers now?)--seems impossible!

They are both sons of good Peace Corps buddies who live nearby. And if Susanne and I can do half as good a job raising Danny as their parents (Becky and Jeff and Steve and Kurula) have done with them, Danny is going to turn out just fine. Better than fine in fact.

In 2005 both these "little fellas" were a big help at our wedding. In this pic below you can see them passing out flowers to all of our guests, (aw look there's my mom...) Gosh, what a difference three years makes huh? In three years Danny will be "crowding" four. Gulp. Big Gulp!!! -Monica

Our poor baby

Fever is not our friend. Nor runny noses that make it hard to nurse properly.

As I write this on Sunday night Danny is sleeping peacefully, and we are” knocking on wood” that this is the end of his 3 day fight against some invading pathogen.

Here’s the story. On Thursday our friend Jenni who watches Danny called Su to let her know he had a fever. Jenni had wisely gave him infant Tylenol earlier which we'd let her know would be perfectly fine with us if he needed it. Su soon left work to go get him, and by the time we got him home and checked, his temp was at 103.2 which of course concerned us. After talking to the nurse at his doctor’s office who confirmed all the things we thought we should do to comfort him.

We debated about Thursday whether to go ahead with our long planned trip to visit Su’s mom in South Carolina, and since by Friday morning his temp was back to almost normal, we decided to travel. Unfortunately though this cold had no intention of giving up so easily.

He ended up being pretty miserable on the flight from DC to Atlanta. With terrible nose congestion he couldn’t really lay down without discomfort and was even struggling to nurse because he couldn’t breathe through his little nose. Our poor baby. Su ended up holding him upright over her shoulder for just about the whole flight. He’d periodically use her shirt as his own personal handkerchief which was quite fine with her. He’d bury his little head in her chest and shake his head from side to side. He cried some but finally he slept. It was that sad pathetic crying rather than the horrible screaming airplane noise that most travelers dread, but it was crying none the less. People seemed pretty sympathetic I think. Fortunately he seemed much more comfortable on our last leg from Atlanta to Charleston.

We have done all the right things regarding giving him Tylenol, tepid baths, saline nose drops and lots of water etc…and it looks like finally his fever broke for good earlier today. It’s actually been quite restful here which has been good for him I think.

I can’t tell you how stressful it is to pick up your crying infant at night and feel how hot he is. I am very grateful for medications that can reduce pain and fever. I’m all about managing pain, ESPECIALLY when it comes to our precious Danny. (This includes hugs and kisses too.)

Thank goodness, by today he seemed well enough to get out of the house and go to our favorite Japanese Steak House where the chef cooks all your food on the hot grill right where you are sitting. Danny loved it. Especially the part where the chef lit up the whole grill with leaping flames. Ironic don’t you think?

Here’s Danny with grandma and mama back to his normal “laughing boy” mode. We sure hope this is the end of this infection. –Mommy Monica

That's bigger than a Butterball Turkey too!

A few weeks ago I wrote a blog post about feeling like the hunchback of Notre Dame. I thought I was improving for a while, but now I know that I'm definitely not right. My neck and shoulder blade on my right side are both super stiff and lately it's been waking me up. I know having a young child to scoop up all the time probably doesn't help, but heck, what can I do?

So I went to my doctor's today and was perscribed a muscle relaxant to start taking tonight. I also have some exercises to do. In the little pamphlet they gave me called "A User's Manual for Your Neck" I read that the human head can weigh up to 15 pound. FIFTEEN POUNDS!

That's just slightly less than what Danny weighs now. Oh, no wonder my poor neck muscles are freaking out. They must be exhausted!!!

I'm hoping that a week of these relaxants and exercises and heat will do the trick. Excuse me while I go lay my head down now. -Monica

Confessions of one who never played with dolls

I'll admit it. I was quite the tomboy. No shame there. I loved all the things that boys got to do. Run, jump, throw, catch, kick—you name it. I have two older sisters and 4 younger brothers and it was always pretty apparent to me that the boys got to do fun stuff, while the girls got to wash and dry the dishes and also do “tables and floors” every night.

And I hated playing with dolls, which I considered to be the most docile activity one could ever engage in. And paper dolls? Perhaps more participatory, but for gosh sakes, they were paper! How can you run, jump, throw, kick or catch that?

So anyway, if others wanted to do that I had no problem whatsoever. I just preferred to play tag and hide and seek etc.

So my big discovery now is that I LOVE dressing Danny in cute little outfits. It’s like he’s my own little, gulp, doll.

This doesn’t make me a sissy now does it? ;-) -Monica

P.S. Here is one of my living doll from about 3 months ago. Oxford shirts that have "onsie" snap bottoms. Brilliant huh?

I don't mean to brag but...

When you attach your kitty's favorite wand (the one she drags around the house and begs you to play with all the time) onto your rambunctious 8 month old's Exersaucer, WOW is everyone happy!